


The Golden Haired Girl

by pritispuki



Category: Loki - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies) RPF, Thor - All Media Types, sigyin loki, world war 2 alternative universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - World War II, Angst, Dark, Eventual Smut, F/M, Lime, Love/Hate, Murder, Sadism, Sadstuck, bucky is a primitive, loki -nazi, malekith is a jerk, nazi camp, selvig - Freeform, sygin jewish girl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-17 21:13:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 33,651
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5885419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pritispuki/pseuds/pritispuki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>world war 2,alternative universe. </p><p>loki is a nazi commandant in the concentration  camp ,where his duty is to get rid of  the jews/ jotuns.but one day ,his view about the "lower race" will start to change.when he sees this girl with the golden hair...especially when he learns about his true origins.</p><p>based on real events.if you dont like this things,please dont read. tags to be added</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Cargo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dear readers,i have pc problem so i apologize in advance for any mistakes,for my german,etc,etc...also,reality bites and i dont know will i conclude the fic.rat mommy wanted a love story with loki and sigyn. i hope she will not hate me.in here loki is a true nazi.since i dont feel comfortable with ssome terms, i ll use jotuns instead of jew,aesirs instead of aryans,thanos inetad of hitler.one of my family members had to run away from the nazis,so i do think i have the right to show them in the negative light.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

the view was reduced to the feeble distance ,for the storm raged ,and violated all that was in its path ,... the ferocity of the wind and the thickness of snow in the perverse company of the mist, have created a wall of invisibility...  
the sounds of the an approaching train ,the rumbling and the horn , were indicating,that it was all proceeding as previously scheduled... the transportation wheeler was almost here, thirty seconds away,perhaps and yet it could still not be seen...even the pines on the other side of the railway were standing as a grand menacing giants ...shapes, only shapes...and the snow,which was knee high...it was absolutely wondrous how there was any trafic at all...but this creation of a man ,was something to be proud of.  
oh,now it was visible,barely ...but its noise could not be misheard or mistaken for the howls ,which were so domesticated here.

  
"the merchandise,herr laufeyson,it has arrived.and only few minutes late.if the day is to be judged by the morning.then it should be a good one ,i guess.but cold.damn cold."

the thin pale lips were dragged into a satisfied,and yet ,a cheap smirk.herr laufeyson was not patient,despite the image he was often projecting .oh, by no means...he had a lot to do upon this winterly day...his underling,herr selvig was no more than just a blundering, dense enumerator,but even he had his purpose in all of this...a purpose for the glorious purpose of the aesir race.  
and he loki odinson was thrown here...into this abyss...for the sake of the same glorious purpose...for fuhrer thanos... miles and miles away from the civilisation...from berlin or munich,where ,his brother thor was spending his days, and comfortably sits in the leather chair,in their father s office .well,at least ,loki had the jurisdictions to bring the burden of his own tasks upon herr selvig .

  
disgusting,parasites jotuns...the steam and smoke of the cigarette became one ..he was smoking,while heavily breathing in this blasted cold...not what the doctor would have ordered,but ...the camp "asgard" was constructed and to the very last detail in the annihilation of the health...so one cigarette more or less...was loki s business alone ,and he was the lonesome wolf here ..to avoid the privileged,dark odinson was the best and the most an effective decision one would have made . thanos has assigned him to dispose of the cargo...

a full time job....what a honor,it was...from the round table,back in the germany to the borders in these eastern lands...the one that needed,to be purified.and cleansed...the way those animals were breeding,it made his stomach churn...he will surely be here for a year or so,if his calculations were correct .why he,why not thor?

  
it seems that studying politics is manifestly unfavorable...all the laudations go to his father,odin,who has become a respectable member of the national socialist party ,and from recently a ceo in the office for the security of the third reich. his oldest son was now a vice president of the mentioned department...and the younger son is also highly ranked ...as an eradicator. loki smirked again...oh ,that thought would always bright up his,already dire days...  
with all the medals that come with the position . commandant of the concentration camp does sounds so much better,does it not . oh,how delightful.and thor,hm...a true representative of the family odisnons-tall broad shouldered ,blonde...a true an aesir...he has graduated marketing ,for bloody sake!oh ,and he has truly promoted..himself!  
another smoke...black ,thick...was being carried along ,with the snowflakes...

  
"schweine" (swines)-er sagte (he said),and blew yet ,an another smoke...to whom,to the still living,breathing cargo,to the eric selving,who was an utter provincial groveller or to ..thor...who deserved,more than anyone else ,to be here,in this forsaken place, instead of him .  
the black locomotive has stopped right in front of the camp. 25 wagons in total.

  
"do have your papers an pencil prepared ,herr selvig? gut (good),you better start writing,for this will be a long day...indeed."

  
"indeed, there should be around 1000 of them".

  
"nur (only ) 1000 ?  das is nicht correct. (that is not right ).it should have been,at least two times as much."

  
"entschuldigung ( im sorry) sir commandant ,aber..."

  
the raven haired commandant was already on his way to the administration office,the sooner he leaves this vile snow behind and gets himself away from the grey faces of those newly arrived ones,the sooner he will pour himself a good old beer made in the region of bavaria. for who would have such a demented desire to see the same dark haired,dark skinned jotuns...dirty,malodorous...lost ...lost in the middle of no where...their hopes also lost...screaming woman,crying children....luckily that spectacle does not have a lengthy duration.trudging on the thirty centimeters high snow ,white the white layers of the thick frozen crystals were falling into his boots,made him even more so vengeful and embittered... but his compensation for wrath,even his had its limitations...his anger could only be directed to the...prisoners....he shouted back...

  
"i'll leave you to it,call me when you separate the women from men and children."

  
"yes,of course herr odinson."

 

                                                                                                                  

 

 

 

 


	2. Goodbyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok dont get confused.i l use scarelett johansson as sigyn ...u may find links to the finds where she played the similar part in the first chapter,in the comments.u can percieve her as natasha or just sigyn...i ll leave that for you to decide..although tasha n loki would make a nice pair

 

 

the capacity of the wagon was for the forty standing positions ,at best ,however the one in which sigyn was pressed against the wall , was crowded with, at least a hundred people..no,that was a lie ,there were so much more drained ,horrified sorrowful souls here...some women were crying at the other end...  
somebody suffocated ...some little boys and girls were also synchronously weeping and calling for their parents...the heart of the asgardian jotun ( german jew-ish) girl was aching,as if the cold hand of death itself was squeezing it...

many had felt the same...and the exchange of the words was gravely limited...they were all just standing ...the portraits of the ghosts...the shadows... of the people they used to be...and now sadly swaying along with the wagon...left ,right..left right...up...dow...up...down...sitting was now mostly the state of the recollection...here,even the primary function ,... urinating ,could be done only in place,while one was standing up...it must have been two ,or was it three days ,since they were shipped off in such an inhuman degrading manner...

"where are they taking us?"-some woman asked all those who would pay her some attention and grant her a merciful response.

"they said...to the working camp. they need the cheap labor in their factories . someone to produce the weapons for those murderers . that's what i have heard."

a vanaheimr (czech ) yelled back.

"rubbish! those are the lies they are feeding all of us with. like we are idiots ! they are taking us to "asgard!" .we are on our way to the slaughter !"

some tall midgardian (yugoslavian) has stated . he was very temperamental ,and ,if this was true ,if they indeed are heading for one fo the worst destinations,a hell on earth , than he should hold back his tantrum .is he does so,he might just live...longer than the most of them here .  
that is all one was able to do,observe the one another ...those the one was facing...for , who could have turn ...

sigyn has closed her large almond eyes .her whole petite body was shivering and was now demanding for the flow of tears...in her silent weeping she did not found any ,any solace .quite the contrary,she has found herself to be more fragile than ever.  
theoric ...they took the young man she loved .not two days before the chitauri soldiers have arrived in her ghetto.  
her family was forcefully moved there .they were allowed to carry one suitcase per person .food was given once a day,brought in the van...uncooked potato and raw rice .the men with helmets would throw the other ones necessity onto the muddy streets...the fastest ones would take more,and the slowest or the oldest ones,nothing. they had to scrape the rest from the mud.  
this was sigyn's sight from the second floor .the very same sight for months ...regardless of minor restrictions which included the mobility inside the geto,lack of the nutrients,the clothes,drugs and warmth,she had to be grateful for this luxury ...this one small room with no bathroom,which she had to share with her mother freya and father iwaldi.

"they will soon come for us,will they not?"-she has formed words in her tiny honey like voice,but those words were merely the thoughts that were spoken out loud.she did not wanted to hear the answer.  
her life that had the duration of about 20 years was coming to its end. what was her crime? she was here,solely on the basis for being the daughter of a an asgardian mother and the nidavelirian father ,who unfortunately had a jotun father .when the soldiers had torn down their doors ,back in frankfurt ,they have given her mother a choice...political in nature,but shameful in its core . to perhaps,never see her husband and daughter again or to pack few of her mostly needed belongings and to accompany her family .the voice of the reason represented nothing here...she has left their apartment to the fuhrer thanos...not turning back.not once.  
......................................................................................

the cars,the cars were here...oh,no!  
the fair haired girl who was boiling that potato, which her father has brought /collected the day before ,and which will be served as their breakfast,lunch and dinner,was the first to notice them.her father was outside the building...trading his only coat for some bread.little to say,he was not allowed to do so ...

"mother!"

the guns already were firing...the men were being executed in the alley.

" mother!"

the girl has ran straight into her mother s arms ...she the sudden fear made her sickly white .

"pssst!"

her mother did warned her and removed few planking from the floor.

"get in ! get in and do not move!"

" but...but what about you?!"

"i ll be alright."

one of her daughter s traits was this overwhelming goodness which would usually resulted with the confusion,so determined feya had to pushed her into the hole.afterwards she used the old rug ,which she has found in the dumpster to cover the worn parquet.  
and right on time.  
the chitauri were on the floor below.

"all jotuns are to come with us!now!"

sigyn has huddled herself in the hole that was meter something per meter something, both in width and height ...she was all ears,even forgetting how to breathe. apparently two out of the four jotuns have shown themselves...the soldiers were marching ,slamming,destroying,searching...

"they are in here,officer!"

the exclamation for his great discovery was thoroughly underlined with the shooting.

"suits them right!"

now the ....the sounds...no,the noise of their black boots was moving up the stairs... to the sigyn s floor.the doors were open,so easily,for the did not have any lock,...it was satirically humorous,really...

"frau freya ..where is your daughter sigyn?"

"i do not know,she has gone out with her father iwaldi. i have not seen them for hours."

the boots again...the officer has walked over the place under which the dirty being,unworthy of existence was curled up ...a girl,whose dreams will never fulfill,who only ever wanted is to be a nurse,or a doctor,a female doctor ...one day,and to marry...to marry for a kind and gentle theoric...  
her mother has cried out .the man must have hurt her.

"you are a whore of a jotun and a scum of the lowest kind ! i will ask you again ,solely because you are an asgardian ! but do not lie to me.your husband was seen not even twenty minutes ago ,and with the bread which he must have stolen .and now...he lies in his own blood three blocks from here .if you do not wish the same thing for yourself,you will tell me where is the bastard girl."

freya will share no tears,for she was,as he has said,an asgardian...and exposing ones emotions was not a behaviour which was highly appreciated in the society...unlike the nidavelierians who were very open hearted and warm people. iwaldi...poor...late iwaldi was a short man with a big wide smile,and a large heart...he loved to sing,dance,and tell jokes...  
sigyn has inherited his smile eyes,and height,but her mother s porcelain skin tone,crystal blue eyes and hair, for which many have said that shone like gold itself .freya was sometimes strict and distant,but she has loved her daughter very much...if there is one thing that the restless girl did desired to get from her mother,was the ability of the self control...freya she was biting her lips ...an act which should help her to hold back the urge to pierce  the fork through  this monster s eyes.

"i am counting to three...and unless you tell me where.."

"i am here!"

sigyn has finally screamed...she could not bear it any more...

"i am here..."

for sigyn indeed had a large heart,and almost none of the self control...

 


	3. Malleus Maleficarum Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the secret meeting from this chapter ,was for real,it is very unpleasant and it caused the murders we have heard of.if you cant stand something like that ,please dont read. for those who have seen the movie "conspiracy" from the 2001.,they know what i am talking about.please be warned

almost exactly,a year ago,1942.,the secret meeting of the 15 of fuhrer thanos officials were ordered to take place.and a quiet lakeside residence in wannsee, in berlin had all the required and desirable elements for such ana event....every decision that is to be made there shall he change the course of the history of mankind as we know it...

two members of the odinson family were invited and now were present .odin and loki.when it comes to thor ,there was still a smaller problem of an exceeding prolongation of his own graduation. the reason for such a delay was quite an argumentative one ,from his view,naturally ...he was more interested in women and drinking.

his father had the word "disappointment " carved upon his face...he was reckoning on his first born ...loki was the second/last option ,for this an assembly was only for those of the highest rank,which were considered to be loyal to the party.it was a great honor,indeed.and odin has taken upon himself to fill the minds of his sons ,with how very important this ( temporarily ) rolle was to him,and thus to them .the young graduate in politics ,has taken this as a chance to get on the  father s good side .he will demostrate himself to be an equal to thor,if not better.

this old mansion was truly breathtaking.only the finest pieces of the glorious asgardian past times were in here .and despite the an eclecticism of various eras,it was very tastefully combined. ..ther was nothing one could not not find in here,from the furniture to the vases...the paintings from the 15 th century to the table from the era of the reign of catherine the great . the origin of this masterpieces were once wealthy jotun families.they will not need their family heirloom .nor the antiques shops where they were selling the same artefacts.

the batler has led them to the room upstairs.it did not got left behind in the estetical sense,yet all those men in uniforms seated around an oval table ,with their papers ,cigars and drinks ,were actually a balck spot upon the picture of da vinci , or a crack upon michelangelo s david. the profound invadiation of this tranquil and wunderbar loation ,which was far from the storm,or so called cultural society. here in this 200 years old walls , many personal stories where written...

odin and loki had their chairs awaiting for them...these men which were surrounding them..generals..professors ..doctors...politicians...a prestige ,indeed.loki was giving more attention to the painting of the early spring s landscape , than to the eminent titles.  
the key issues,here and now , was how to solve the problem of the jotuns,and other untermenschen ...undesired evil races...as they have,humbly called them,for they were not humans...and loki had to adopt that study.  
...............................................................................

  
while he was still a student at his university,loki odinson witnessed the brutality against a jotun woman...she was stripped naked in the streets before the large mass of decent citizens and beaten up to death...

"they should be erased from the face of the earth.remember that loki."

his father would point a finger at his son's face...ithe mirk glance was still lying heavily on the other's face....  
"but...fath.."

odin slammed his fist onto the table.his face have reddened and eyes were filled with fury. disobedience and disappointment,were this the names he should have given to his sons?

"enough!do not question me,boy.this is a serious matter . what would you rather-to lie somewhere in the gutter or to be well situated ? to have anything your heart desires? to become a true politician?or a commander ?the bread which you have and the bed,in which you lie in every night...you can thank that to my position ...the party and fuhrer."

.....................................................................................................

  
loki,at that point did not know what to say. for escape was futile...he had to embrace the lesser of the two harms ..so when he saw that women ,who had crawled on all fours ,and ended in her own blood.. he was one of many who just stood there ...with  the rest of the ubermenschen ,and let the ice covers his heart.and bit by bit...until it was not seen anymore..  
figuratively speaking .that was  years ago.loki odinson who was attending this historical meeting was the outcome of odin's manipulations- an intellectual with an absolute lack of sympathy towards the thieves who were stealing from the asgardians ...their homes,jobs...their spouses...thieves...useless and filthy..  
the main subject was being discussed and all were included.loki had to only answer when he was addressed and accept  the agreed terms .

victor von doom was very insghtful,indeed:"goethe said that theories are gray,but that real life is green.stop chattering, and be realists here.I insist, as I have before,that the best way is the quickest way.purge them totally off our land,ideally, off our planet.and for the eastern territories,leave us able-bodied workers."

"let's have the food in here."-the one aremed general was not thus interested,and has found dr.. von doom to be quite a target for provoking.

"I wish to keep going.We can eat while we work."

"i agree."

that was the voice of odin.loki merely blinked.

"what we have are ghettoes filled and overfilled....with the scabrous, the rotting.We do not have the food for them.the stink of their diseases does not stop at the walls.and you ship them up to use by the thousands to deal with.what are we to do?we have no place to put them.We have no more place to put our own.we cannot shoot 3.5 million jotuns.we cannot poison them,and we cannot use them."  
dr. von doom was a man of a remarkable name.it served its purpose,evidently.

"I'm sorry, why can't you shoot them?"-general barnes had to yell now and then.his views were poor in substantiation.

  
"didn't you hear him? It is the worst thingfor our soldiers to be doing.They are women and children,and soldiers have a sense of honor.Inefficient use of time, troops,equipment, bullets. no."-someone added.

"using gas is much cheaper and less public."-dr, doom lifted his chin ,as an gesture that he is in more than one /field above the rest of so called academics .amateurs! his frightening methods were considered to be the one of a genius .he would stand next to nikola tesla.if tesla was not a midgardian.shame.  
"please."

the general was not fond of philosophs...action was required.action...

dr doom lowered himself and opened his leather case.a tick pile of documents was now before him.after searching for a peartiucular one,his started:

"tesseract program has used injections......but most effectively......a carbon-monoxide gas.we began using it in  1940.an area is constructed that resembles a shower room or a bath.The subjects are brought in naked,as though for a shower......we, terminated this particular program,however, we began the advanced one.last summer, we ordered the construction of 20 mobile gassing trucks......using their redirected exhaust back into the chamber.Three such trucks have been in usesince last month.-In each truck,you can get in 40 to 60 jotuns at a time.In fact, the more you have in,the faster it works."

"If it is already built, what is this meeting?why bother?the system has shown that it works."-general barnes leaned over .he appeared to be more a local drunk village than a person of his qualifications .his uniforms were unbuttoned and crumpled .he was not regarded as an equal to any person here.he did not seen it,of course.

"It will work .the method is now defined."

the doctor has lowered the document.and let his eyes fall on every and each one of them. the expected reactions were ,indeed expected.  
"that is progress."  
said odin.

and so it was determined,that the gas chambers are the most an economical and civilized method to dispose of the "others".and afterwards ,odin had an unpleasantly surprised for the raven son of his,when he pulled some strings and suggested loki,and in his own name ,for the privilege of overseeing the executions.  
..................................................................

"ja....there should be 20 of them in each line."-the commandant had orders for his shorter assistant ...clint barton was very efficient as a supervisor ...and he was obedient .und herr loki was able to rely upon him.  
now when the women were in lines, loki tossed the cigarette and leaved it to melt its way under the cold whiteness...he was tall,his demeanor and charisma ,have characterized him as an untouchable ... his gaze murderous..literally...  
women have lowered their hads...this greetings of the newcomers was so tiresomely traditional for loki.he merely wanted to get it over with... pacing among them ,disinterestedly...

"sie,sie,sie...und sie,sie ,sie ..ya...und..und...sie und sie.sie sind krank ... und dieses ist alt.."

(she ,she,she and she and ...and ..and she.they are sick...and this one is old.)

the women to which he has pointed out, were shot at spot. cowardly from the behind...  
and those who cried were .. as also ..clint of that and his guards made sure ...loki cared not. a new cigarette was burning in his hand...  
sigyn has brought up her head slightly ...how could he...for all that is holy ...this was not a man ,this was a monster...he has turned then and their eyes have met..

 

                               

 


	4. Relevance  Of  The Name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok,i really dunnpo if u,dear readers like the stuff or not.and i am struggling should i delete the story...rat mommy says no.i value her opinion,but i would aslo like to hear yours.is it so hard to write a word or two...plizzzzzzzzzz.u can even say shitty stuff.the constructive criticism is welcome.  
> also the pics-only from the movies-i would never put real photos.and i will try not to put the worst movie shots.

 

 

 

"was ist ihr name?"()what is your name )with a calm,phlegmatic voice,he queried a woman , who was trembling .as if she had no reasonable justification for such a forlorn behaviour .  
she did whispered something ,and it came out barely hearable...so he asked again,this time evidently more more irritated and impatient .and she has repeated... her own voice was hoarse and weak.even speaking to her represented a hardship ...when one did not tase any liquid for days...the simple act of speaking was a demanding task.

"i still can not hear you. cant you talk normally?i see that this may be a clear sign of sickness,and we don't need feeble ones for our factories.they are only slowing the other ones down."  
"nein,nein,i can sprechen!"-(no,no,i can speak!) she cried out and in the state of utter horror,she has accidentally grabbed his sleeve and pulled ...his eyes have said what his lips did not had to,she will not see the next sunrise.

"herr selvig,die liste ,bitte...danke." (mister selvig,the list,please...thank you.)  
loki was linking the names with the faces , before he has deicded to continue.

"those which names i am to call out,must step forward.others will stay in line .now..:"

they have said that the woman and men ,who are elected ,are assigned for the labor . every name was a saved life .they would dig the ditches,bury the dead ones within them...they would work on a rail or make bullets...nevertheless, they would live. sigyn have waited for her name to be read out .it was becoming so cold and she had to cover half of her face with the old blanket .an attempt to maintain some warmth and to be able to breathe .

 

this asgardian was an evil itself, insidiously disguised in the form of a an attractive man.even in his attractiveness , the sinister nature of his wicked heart was being manifested.for the eyes were the windows to ones soul...and his ones were profoundly immoral and malevolent.  
loki was watching her with the corner of his eyes...andfound a thrill in her reaction as he would read an another's name.her hopes were abandoning her,and the shadows of despair and fear were taking that place.

"gut,all of you will be taken to the showers and cleaned thoroughly ...after which you will be given new clothes."

the relaxation and smiles and tears of joy were immediately being spread among the chosen group, yet ,to the others nothing was left but the mortification and (inner) torture.  
loki observe attentively ,as the group was pushed into the crimson building .the walls were barre ,without a facade,thus the bricks ,which were used for this small "tower " were standing out in this achromatic surroundings...the very function of the said building was ,the one discussed upon the meeting in the wanasse...there they will be shaved and then...

now his eyes were upon this blonde girl.she has almost appeared to be an aesir,almost...she was not the first fair haired and blue eyed jotun,nor she was the first one the express the stubbornness and anger ,but..however, this but was intriguing him...he needs some amusement in this realm of ice and snow..and it just did not seemed proper to erase her name from that list...not just yet.

the crimson bricks building ...the large thick smoke was exiting through the chimney..  
sigyn gasped at the sight of it ...they were tricked!her mouths were wide open and eyes wet ,and the schock prevented her from perceiving the commander, who was now hardly few inches from her.  
"name."  
he asked her....  
"um,was...um,mein name......sigyn!"

oh,she hoped she said it loud enough.but it did not matter...the asgardians and the chitauris were only finding an excuses to commit the genocide.the deriving pleasure from inflicting pain ,was in their blood...as if they needed a cause to do what they intended.  
those thin murderous lips dragged into a leer.

"sigyin?what a ..strange name.it is not a characteristical jotun s name,is it?"  
"nein,it is not."  
"hmm... tell me now... what can you do ...jotun?"

"was?"

"are you dense? i asked you,what are you capable of doing ? can you cook,clean?can you even read?"

why was he questioning her this...those simple questions were hiding a darkness behind them..

"yes,i can cook ,clean...i can do almost everything."

her mother said to her :"sigyn do whatever it takes,but stay alive..."  
and sigyn will grasp any chance of continuing her existence,for this blasphemous war cannot last much longer.and maybe,only maybe one day she will be reunited with her mother again.  
the commander took few steps back,and let his gaze travel from her head to her feet and upwards again...he was smoking that cigarette...in the most lascivious manner...each second that has passed made her more and more exposed to thi beast.  
loki did not refer to her again .instead he has said something to the two guards,which were until now constant ,for they showed no reactions.they guns ,which they have carried have enabled them to do as less,with the most an effect.  
the men smirked .and sigyn could only watch them as they cut the distance between her and them...their harsh hands seized the girl and started to roughly haulingl her to some unspecified place.

"no,please...i didn't do anything! please...where are you taking me?"


	5. Ungrateful Gratefulness

 

 

a blade in her hand ...a blade on his throat...this was the (gerechtigkeit ) justice ..or was it?  
for what was occurring in loki's room,in front of the wide double door window...which was standing between them and the graceful theatrical performance of the snowflakes ...was not what sigyn's powerful imagination have set out to be.

the state of things as they actually exist was naughtily in the comparison of the scenes that were being replaced in front of her eyes,only mere seconds ago..  
for the truth was this :she was a servant...a mere servant...for a two weeks or more ...and he...he was her master...and that blade... razorblade ,actually...was but a part of their daily ritual...

7 am was prearranged for shaving...this twisted egomaniac,this villain would sit in from of the window...his head would be thrown back and his jades would discerningly regarded ...controlling her every movement , from upside down ...as if he could see right into her very soul...when he have said nothing at all...she feared him the most...she stopped and returned the gaze... the possessed sight of the hungry wolf from her captor,made her turn her gaze away again and to return  to the cleaning of her aesir master ...

his hand was suddenly around her wrist and then it casually slided down...that action has sent shivers down her spine... was he being cautious of her own actions...perhaps he was...perhaps the other thing,...please let it not be both cases....

  
yes, she was holding the razor,and yes ,upon every day ,ever since she was being closed in this dungeon ,not 5 minutes of driving away from the camp,and with him...but ,she was too frightened to attempt anything...to complete her inner scenarios ...it was enough for him to merely threw a sharp glance at her...it was more than enough...what if she fails,what if...one mistake is all it takes for him to...  
throughout all this burdensome days and nights she would ran at the sound of his voice or the bell,bowed her head.,clean the floor...once,twice...five times in a row ...

"no it is not sufficient ! i am still unable to see my reflection in it!it has to be spotless! es wieder tun! (do it again !")

  
herr odinson had a short temper...or maybe he considered it to be his forte...to surround himself in this shallow belief of how great he is...how superior...  
the girl on her knees would obey every time...no questions asked...no protesting of any sort...nor diminishing the authority of the dunkler mann (dark man ),as she called him...soundlessly,of course......

and he would had leaned on the door frame,smoking his cigarette and watched as she  furiously rubbed the surface...was this exhilarating him,..the sight of a submissive,inferior women...he had not touched her yet,in a way where she will not be able to defend herself...but she could discern the likes of he...it was only a matter of time,when this two-faced reserved gentleman ,as her maister was , would take of his mask and expose his true self...if that does happen,she ...she should be prepared...scrubbing ,and rubbing ...and clenching her teeth would avail her in the mastering the ability to control herself, for she would not give loki any delight and a cause to gloat .

  
no...instead , she has thought of her mother,her father..theoric...  
but ,when those memories of him would increase the sorrow ,for then it would be an unbearable to comprehend that they indeed were the pictures,which her subconscious have stored in , only to play with her...then she would work even harder...and herr commander would always appear from nowhere and stare at her...  
from 8 am until 4 pm she was free of him...but that meant that her people were not...his luxurious villa was a mockery ,in a vulgar monument to the slaves under hill ,upon which this house  was welcoming the morning sun.sigyn would hear the shots ,see the smoke,and she would not come to the balcony...she would work to forget...and would go to her small bed in her small room at 10 pm ,cover herself over the head and silently cry herself to sleep...

  
..................................................................................................

  
loki sighed deeply...his maid's hands were thus tender and small..like his mother s...and sigyn was in a way like frigga...that was an understandable a favorable quality...his mother was a special woman,one of a kind...and the jotun servant.

  
...she was also inimitable ..he knew that from the start ,and that is why he had separated her from the other lowlife creatures...she must be thankful ,for he went against the protocol and risked his reputation for a jotun ...but even a virus,a bacteria were arousing one's curiosity or interest ...were they not? for even they had their purpose in the circle of life...his opinion of the jotuns have not become more positive ,by this inconsiderable an eureka.  
after finishing her present obligation and cleaning her master s face and neck ,the girl turned on her heels... she was about to take out and dispose of the sordid water,but loki was faster and closed the door right in front of her...sigyn froze...

  
"now put that down...".

he meant the bowl and the towel...she placed them carefully on the chair and lowered her head...  
"what kind of a spell have you put on me ,sigyn?"

  
this was the first time he called her by her name...until now she was yet a servant,a maid,a jotun...filth...  
"i beg your pardon ,herr commandant?"

  
he let her contemplate his words,and what is behind them,in silence as his hand reached out to her... he cupped her round face ...and his cold have fingers traced the lines of her full pink lips...  
"before i have met you,i despise all of your kind...and now you...you have woken the feelings inside of me,of which i knew nothing about ..."  
sigyn did not have even  time to blink ,when he joined their lips together in a passionate ,possessive kiss...

                                                                         

                                                

                                                                                            


	6. Broken Heart And  Broken Body

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey!this is short and i will edit .however the most of the story was erased from my pc,so i had to rewrite it again.if u know how to restre the text in wordpad...please help!

.....................................................................................................  
she did not gave in to this classical enforcement and thievery of the last tracks of her dignity as a human.loki was the one who merged their bodies and was the one who separated them  .in his self-inflicted martyr s anguish he stayed away from this mädchen (girl) and hoped for a signal .the one which would indicate it is alright to make the next step. when he sensed that she was more relaxed in her new surroundings ...when he saw that she smiles...he had to tell her how he, indeed feels... surely the signs were not misinterpreted ,yet then why the tears? he lifted her fallen chin upwards...now completely demanding a non verbal explanation of her s mournful appearance and rigid behavior.he was the last person to deserve this ......the last ...was he not the one who granted her all this comfort and more...jotuns were thus ungrateful creatures...was her act of declining him,his sentiments ,which were more than evident ,some sort of an attempt to evoke his interest and admiration in a powerfully irresistible way ...was she aiming for something more through such a low theatrics?

he looked deeply into those sorry eyes...and found none of what he sought .damn ,you girl...were those tear drops a result of practicing in front of the mirror...while he was absent?

"what is it?have i done something wrong,sigyn...after all this time,i have come to believe that you do not have any constraints or false virtue,when it comes to me,to us?"

her eyes widened and lips parted ..did she heard this correctly...yes,after all this time...of her being degraded ,and her witnessing of her people being exposed to the horrors of genocide,he...he speaks of them...was he a mad man?  
did he actually thought , that she would share his enthusiasm and spread his legs for him,even though her unwillingness was clear .and no one dead or alive could testify it differently .whatever she was to say now would reflect upon he fate...or was her fate sealed when she refused to look at her master?

"ich..ich kann das nicht tun,.." (i ..i can not do this...)-even her voice begged for some understanding.

"was ... kannst du nicht tun.?" (what ...cant you do?)

"es...(it) ... i have done all you have asked of me , herr commandant,but do not ask of me this.please."

well,this certainly was beyond what he had anticipated...something inside him cracked...she was preiceving him as a butcher and a murder and all her signs and gentle touches were a part of her role...her gestures and action were used only to get some advantage or profit...my,my ,she was probably laughing at how utterly ridiculous he was...

"you have disappointed me greatly,for i have not expected something so impure and so characteristic for your folk to be also present in you .perhaps... it was my error to bring you here , after all...or was that a part of you plan,hm?to seduce me? what would you ask of me afterwards...was (what) is hiding in that pretty little head of yours? what were you aiming for...an extension of your miserable life or ...some geld (money) ...for you,jotuns yearn for it,dont you?"

this disrespectful and scornfully abusiveness he was throwing at her...and "her folk"...all those innocent women ,children and men...and finally ,her own family and a man who was to be her future husband...he was not only insulting her intelligence and implying the most untruthful statements ,but he has dug under the line , where all her ache,mourning and regrets were accumulating ...  
and just like that, her restrainment was gone ...come what may...but even down there,in the gutter,in the mud...she would have one right,she did not have a right to have here...a right to form the thoughts of your own...

"how dare you...for you were the one who has brought me to this place and made me your servant.and i have worked hard,i have learned the meaning of the word submission,and i have ran to your every request...but i would never,ever desired to be with a monster like you!"

"what did you say?!"

"i said that you are a .."

he has slapped her with all his strength...one side of her face was burning ...her head was spinning and the blood was already uncontrollably gushing from her nose and lip....

"umh..."-she only moaned...and loki cursed himself for acting in such an uncivilised fashion ...but it was her fault...she has made a fool out of him ...mocked him....well done...madchen...look what you have done...(and to me)...the punishment shall come to us all...and so this was yours...  
she spat blood on the floor and partially turned her aching body to him...

"yes,beat me..humiliate me...but you will not have me...i would rather die as a jotun ,than to be a whore of an asgardian!"

his heart just dropped ...so much bitterness ...but anything he was about to say ,shall nerve be spoken,for his officer clint was at the doors...he must have heard the noise.

 

 

                                                            

 

"ist alles in ordnung,commandant?"-(is everything alright, commander?) he asked..his eyes went to the bloody maid and then back to his superior.not an uncommon sight...he has seen some more obscene scenes in berlin...

loki s posture was now, the one,he had when was dealing with his men... crude ...and kept under a sever control

"this filthy  jotun,here ,is not showing her gratitude for being in my service .her wish is to...what did you said...to die ? well then...i am a host ,who only wants to please his guests...clint would you mind...take her to where she belongs...with the others..."

clint quickly nodded and scooped the girl from the floor ...

when the doors were closed again,and the smell of cigarettes and that scotch have became a dominant elements in his room ...loki as an archetype of a failure of a man ,was drowning his sorrows in his vices...why was he so beaten down ,for he has done not one thing wrong...his only mistake was letting her to bewitch him...and he was even prepared to take her with him...once when the war was over...  
another glass was filled ..then another and another...

"i hate you sigyn...i hate every single one of your people ...you blood sucking.. mendacious ..."

he could not deceive or lie to himself ,not here not in the mere presence of...himself...  
where did clint take her?not to the "showers" ...!  
he left his glass and the cigarette to burn down , on its own and rushed to the doors ,but then the phone rang...  
he was still holding the knob...but he had to answer...what if it was someone von kapital ( from the capital)?

"hallo?"

after taking the call...herr commandant has forgotten all about the golden haired girl...


	7. Everything / Nothing

when was the last time ,the two odinsons have stood side by side ,as equals?never...regardless of the celebration of yet an another victory over the enemy ,which was held in the city ,they were still....side by side ...equal...in sorrow...

  
when the priest spoke, loki did not listen...when the church bells thundered , thor was left oblivious to them...when the soldiers saluted the deceased odin,frigga was only conscious of her own tears...the extravagance of her husband s funeral had nothing to do with his family ...she would prefer a more humble private one , yet all those men from the party, have organized it by their own criteria...even his casket had the fuhrer s mark upon it...odin,the one she loved, and the one for whom she would often turn the other cheek,and the one she could not forsake...was never truly hers...he belonged to the world of business,papers,negotiations and secret meetings...the world so strange and inexplicable ,especially to the modest ,loyal house wife.

thor's large hand was lying on loki's shoulders...the younger brother was tense,just staring into the hole...he was mesmerized and out of the borders of this time and space...what now?where was he now? his father had a heart attack ,but he was ill ,and long before ...of course no one was bothered to inform loki odinson about the matter ...the moments,when he could be there with his family ...for his family ,...were non existent...an empty hole in the continuity of the linear chronology...like this one.....he was not even present to say goodbye... r his father might be many things ,but he was still his father...and loki loved him...unconditionally...

their relationship was a , complicated one...to be mildly put. the old man ,has supported thor's an idle attitude towards his education and tasks ,in general,but he was evermore there for the large spiv..  
,as a black and white comparission...loki s mouth was shut and head lowered as he did what he was being instructed...ordered...if he would refuse...the punishment was a matter that would arrive within mere seconds ...sometimes physical even...that is what loki got accustomed to ...love through pain..  
his darling mother did not had the authority or power to stop odin in his whipping of the boy,...he would locked her up to prevent an interference as he had taught his son a valuable lesson ...oh,how many times has frigga found her son, soundeslly sobbing after being exposed through such a terror,..

"your father has a harsh temper,just like his father and your grandfather ...but he loves you loki,you must know that...he just does not know how to render it."-she would whisper into his ear as she cradled and rocked him...upon what would a small boy held,if not the hope...and while the vision of the belt was still in front of him...  
and what is left when one s goal is taken away before his eyes,a goal upon which one has worked since the day one..and his goal was only to please his father...was it all in vain?

...........................................................................................................

in their house ,which was now reduced for one member,the guests were coming and leaving...drinking ,jesting or would walk around and carry a sad face (when they approached the weeping widow.)..their mood was uneven and would alter by the minute...dependable upon the alcohol,acquaintances or if they have forgotten themselves, and the meaning of this gathering.

  
"now when your father is gone,you are not obligated to stay in that abyss of plague,loki. you are free to spread your wings...i have heard that there will be some open positions in the fuehrer's office...you should apply...your loyalty and fulfillment of the tasks have been estimated as a supremely valid ones ...who knows...does the title of the head secretary or an office manager sound inviting,i should say so."

  
one of his father friends,malekith,found the perfect time and place to chit chat about business...loki held a strong an noticeable antagonism towards the man.his very presence would make his stomach turn... malekith was prone to change sides as the wind changes its directions...odin has loaned him some amount of money years ago,and as it was expected, he never saw that money again...but everything his father did,was for a reason.thus perhaps the head of the family was enduring this trottel (jerk) for his own interests.for this primitive  knew the ones who were worth of knowing.

  
"danke (thank you) ,ill think about it,however understandably - not today."  
every word ,loki pronoiunced had a certin weight attached to it.so that even those lacking of intelligence or common sense might cognize an inkling. mallekith coughed ,for he has forgotten that some people indeed posses those irrelevent emotional state ,such as feelings .

  
"oh,yes,pardon me.take your time.... coughing ...now i must depart,for i have some errands to do...send my regards to your mutter (mother) and bruder (brother) "

  
"will do.".  
.......................................................................................................................................................

  
finally,oh finally ... this exhilarating heavy day has come to the past ..the night itself was a almost a salvation...their tradition was to sit by the fireplace and listen to the radio...the news were highly appreciated and a necessity......the news of war were priceless...and not many households could afford to have this transmitting device .sadly that was before ,before loki was "banished" from the convenience of his home...  
he sat on the sofa and looked at frigga...a petite woman was rocking in the rocking chair.. her hands were crosses on her lap...she has covered herself with the same woolen scarf ,which she made over a 10 years ago.

  
"mother..how are you feeling?"

  
he asked her gently for she was ,indeed in quite a delicate state.she was moving so slowly ,so surrealistically ...and it caused the fear to creep inside loki...will she be the one to follow her husband, to follow odin to the other side ...and soon?

  
"i am so tired loki,so tired.."

  
" if there's anything i can do to help you...please tell me ."

  
her usually kind expression,presently seemed so gravely ... .she had a gray tone to her skin ..a symptom of a lethal illness...  
he dug nails into his hands...he must not make false conclusions ,which had their basis in his paranoid nature...

  
"no,i am fine,loki,really.i have thor to do some errands for me.and our maid eir does the rest...cooking...cleaning...do not worry about me mein sohn (my son) .right now ,your main concern should be you.."

  
"me?"

  
hah,now that was an overtsnatement,or was it the understatement...his resentment for his sufferings and accusations he had against odin, were replaced by shame...his father only did what he believed to be the best for his children.he was as strict as any asgardian father should be...and it was loki who was thus feeble and unworthy...

  
"what do you want to do now loki...thor misses you...i miss you...you should come home ...permanently ..."

  
he remembered sigyn...her fate was still unclear to him...and to call the camp s office only to ask about his maid...it was...an act of suicide.

  
"i do not know,mother...maybe yes,maybe no..."

  
"you do not belong there loki...i can see how it is affecting you.you belong with us...and if you do not find a job you desire,you can always work with your brother."

  
there was not even the lighest thrill in being pressed under thor s greatness ,on a daily basis by all those men of rank ,but now when he lost one of his parents, he understood how much  family ties do matter...and how unavoidable they ,sadly are..even thor's laziness and selfishness seemed so trivial.

  
"ill think about it."

  
he said and stood up.

  
"you should go to bed, mother.it has been a painful day for all of us."

  
she took his hand and leaned her soft cheek onto it.

  
"as i said ,do not worry about me.now you go get rest,son...you were the one who traveled for days."

  
..........................................................................

  
sleep would not arrive...and loki was left with the nightmares of the awake condition. sitting in the dark for hours...he has  drank pills against the headache..combined with some alcohol...he was restless ,both tired and tireless and was under a heavy burden of guilt .

  
...but there was something more besides that...something was not allowing him to rest.and that something told him to get up and go down the stairs ...at first,he ,of course ignored  such an irresponsible suggestion,when he only wanted to disappear inside of  this darkness...this compulsive urge was not leaving him,so at last,  he obeyed  his subconscious...

  
the fire was still comfortably crackling and unequally lightning the furniture in the room..and his mother was still on that chair...when he has left her, she was visually serene as if she has reconciled with the situation but now ,she was silencing her cries with the tissue..

  
the green eyed man gently embraced her...a consideration of hers past embraces..his petty gesture of a gratitude...for all her sacrifices...  
they spoke nothing,and stayed in that position for some time...  
then she pushed him a bit and wiped her eyes..

  
" loki,there is something that i wanted to tell you for a long time,but your father has forbid me to do so ."

  
of all the possible outcomes which were only causing a severe stress ,herr commandant was not and will never be prepared for what he was about to discover.  
his mother revealed a letter which was,until now hidden under the scarf.

  
"that loki ,is for you...i'll leave you to read it alone,but regardless of the contents within it,you must know that we all love you very much... and that this piece of a paper will not change that .."

  
"what does it say? mutter you are scaring me!"

  
"nothing and...everything..."


	8. Erased Memories

"darling wife..  
it was a letter from odin to frigga .and an quite old one...corroded in time ...  
the first fact of which loki became aware of ,what lured him as a notable factor ,was the date: october the 30th,1918.  
and the address was not mentioned,however odin spoke often of how he has fought on the western front in the first world war.

"liebling frau darling (darling wife),  
ich weiss (i know) that you are worried about me,but all is well.our barricades have not been broken,and by the time you will be reading this letter,the news of the end of the war will be an official .due to the unfavorable situation on the battlefield ,the allies have in several places broke through the lines upon the south.. the famine and epidemics, also resulted with the revolts among our men.  
the collapse of our great land,the beginning of the end,they say... for under the threat of revolution, the high command asked the allies for a truce, and the chancellor has declared an abdication of emperor ultron.the unconditional surrender of germany,is but a matter of time .  
the war is over..we can only expect a release letter from our superiors .ja (yes) ,i am soon to arrive home.aber (however) ,not empty handed.you see,i will be bringing you a  
geschenk (gift).  
what kind of a gift ,you ask me? during our final mission ,we have penetrated the village on the borders. we were ambushed ...luck was on our side,and the attack was not thus cleverly planned .they were defeated ,and within an hour .after that we have occupied the village.  
yes,there was an open fire and some civilians were killed .after the detailed inspection of the abandoned places,i have entered this one house .it was not the appearance that called me into it,for it was like any other there,really..it was a sound...a child was crying .yes,frigga,there i saw a 6 year old boy ,in the ruins. the roof has fell on him,causing heavy head injuries .  
i have pity the child and took him back to our doctor .it seems that the boy s memories were permanently lost,erased,if you will.despite his peril the child was wise and logically an advanced one ,even more than some men here.he is also shy and well mannered . he became dear to my heart.i told him,for the reasons unknown to me ,that i was his father.  
and he has believed.. i have decided to bring him back to berlin."

  
.................................................................

 

the heavy sleep which was consuming thor since his childhood was not excluded even tonight,yet the scream and the sounds of furniture being broken ,which came from the downstairs ,would woke up even the dead...  
in the living room there were pieces of glasses and vases spreaded all over the carpet, imported from abroad.the table and the chairs were also lying around...loki was kneeling and holding his hand ...he cut himself..that was one of those crucial momentums,which thor would like to remove from his vision and subconscious...for he did not want to perceive his brother like this .the blood was dripping on a piece of paper in which he was staring...

 

 

                     

 

 

 

"loki,verdammt (damn it) !why on earth would you do this?are you insane,brother.!?"

"you...youuuu...treacherous liar!you knew all along,didnt you? you knew and did not tell me!"

"knew what?what...what is all this?!"

"that i am not you brother! that my parents were some poor jotuns who died from the hands of your father and his men!"

the blonde man rubbed his eyes and face...he did not deem to be qualified enough to discuss or explain thus formidable subject to loki.during the summer break,when he has arrived from the boarding school,there was a small dark haired boy playing with the toys he,himself has outgrown .he was told that the boy was adopted but has lost his memory and believes that thor is his brother.  
the first sensate was rage,jealousy,and resentment,for he had an intruder in his house,..who was touching his things...he was resolute to make the boy s life a living hell,but then loki turned his large eyes and asked scaredly..

  
"um..excuse me,but...but ..are you my brother?i am so sorry,but my head still hurts and i can't remember."

  
that was all it took,merely one look into those sad eyes.but the evidential clumsiness of the younger junge (boy) has succeeded with  forming a smile on the older s boy s face.oh,he was not his competition at all.  
he has been through so many already ,the last thing he needed is to go though yet another pattern of suffering.so much  has happened in his short life.but he did not remembered any of it. perhaps,it was a good thing after all.and what was mostly important ,was that he did not look like a complete bore .thor shrugged his shoulders..

  
"maybe i am.what would you think of that?"

  
loki has smiled so widely and brightly as if he has found a missing piece of a puzzle he was searching for forever..

  
"nice to meet you thor.um... i hope ,that you are not angry...i am putting your marbles into the boxes,by the color , so that you may find them more easily ...when you need them."

  
"you...you are sorting my toys?"

  
"yes...um...do you mind...i am sorry if.."

  
"no,no ,no ..thank you...little brother."

  
"you are welcome... big brother,hehe!"

  
.the giggling of little loki was yet one more of those priceless moments which could not be  repeated...that was how thor wished to remember his little bruder.

  
.....................................................................

  
loki's hysterical demeanor ,was unfortunately about to wake up the adjacency ..accusations , profanities...his face was wet and reddened from all those tears ,his hand and clothes covered with blood ...frigga broke down ,she was to weak to stand ...which was only making his blood boil even more...acting! that is waht this was-acting! where was the angelic gentle woman who  he knew as his mutter? for before him stood a complete stranger.and thor....an idiot...all made sense now...odin...odin who took him from his true home and brought him here as some kind of a trophy ...even if the primary intention was not to present loki as a freak...in the end,he was just that.he was not brought to be marveled at,but to be undervalued and tormented...for he was a gift...a jotun...

  
"i have killed my own people!my own people!"

  
"shh loki,please the neighbours...please !"

  
"mother,was sagt er...(what is he saying) ? he can not be a jotun! that is absurd!"

  
"oh! so...you were unware of that...the most important detail!  now you can murder me right here in this very room,and be given a medal for your courage.so...what are you waiting for? ha!?"

  
this woman was imploring him , to cease this suffering he was causing her...the very scene was unsightly,and loki wanted to heave.

  
"ich hasse dich  (i hate you) more than them ! do you wish to know why?!  it is because you made me love you,the most...mutter."

  
thor managed in restraining him ,by twisting his arms behind his back ,however loki threw his head backwards.thor s nose produced this cracking noise ...and the younger man seized the opportunity and vanished in the dark streets.


	9. Safe  / Unsafe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey! thank u for the support and kudos,guys! i will edit this chpt,but the pc is making it so difficult right now,sorry.

 

                                                    

 

he was deprived of any responsiveness to the scenery around him.the state of numbness,was the state of one's weakness... many perils could be an  omitted .... to wander in  the familiar part of the town was one thing ...and yet ,berlin has had many small alleys,barely touched by the street lamps.....something was moving from behind that large garbage heap .it might be a cat or it might be something or someone else...and loki has finally allowed himself to observe this fairly unknown location to him. and to be more precautious.  
every step he took was highly risky...to walk under the lights ,would led to be discovered , taken to the camp or to soil the asphalt with his blood.in other words to bring to an end his mockery of a lifetime ... jotuns were shot at...no questions asked...now that thor has found out that he is a detestable...that he is a jotun,himself ...he will surely inform the authorities,...the other ,not so much preferable election was to lunge and drag oneself around the side streets...

...that was also a path into a certain death ...he sighed and leaned on the one of the buildings wall...was it snowing...he did not noticed at all... and his only object of an aid and salvation against the cold was this jacket made of a fine ...thin material.oh, he would kill for a cigarette now...he has found an ease ,a friend in that silent killer...the addiction was always a substitution for something...what was it for him...love,friends,the list seemed to stretch into an eternity...now when he was contemplating about it....

  
...he has adjusted the collar,but the wind had the sharp teeth . its bites would attain right to his bones...was ,this a misery,then...he thought ...and then he saw all those men ,women and children from the camp...and he was one of them.it was not the question of how, but when will he meet the same fate.

  
for how long was he walking?few hours...he was not sure...so he turned a full circle ...the houses here were of a newer date,while his house was built in the 1800s... after the ww1 the manufacturers have experienced a so called renaissance .thus many have left the countryside and replaced the land for this inexpensive apartments ...  
the most classical tale of all... a pursue for job,money,prosperity...this would be the middle class district.,then ..to someone who grew up with the financial benefits,this seemed far worse than it truly was.  
middle class,lower class..various names for the same ...standard.

  
he passed one apartment. a light was lit in there...and even though he has  found the voyeurism to be a repugnant wont of those financially limited,the sight was ...it has deepened the wantings and emptiness ,that have made him who he was today...a father and mother were consoling a little girl,who was ,perhaps only too afraid of the night itself,and refused to sleep without a  light turned on ,which was her guide into the dreamland.at last ,the lights faded ,as much as loki s vision ..

  
.................................................................................

 

it was an early in the morning,when the door bell stirred the already agitated frigga and an upset thor .this was all new to him,the sensation was only discovered...to be pressed under the pile of bricks ...of which ,the quantity kept increasing ...a leisurely nonchalant man as thor was,who considered that problems come only to those who would ask for them,the pessimists ,for example,was now forced to question himself about the deeper meaning of it all...why has this negativity fallen upon his family? they were good,honest people!

  
the bell...he was the one to open the doors...  
it was heimdall,a spotter, who worked in the observatory.  
thor immediately recognized him,for they have had spoken  on a few occasions ...

  
"heimdall?"

  
and then in his viewpoint stepped out his brother.he had the yellowish tone to his skin,and a large dark bags under his eyes.

  
"oh...loki!"

  
the man both thoughtful and serious in his character and manner has practically shoved the dark haired man towards thor.loki has caught a fever.. and while he believed that the quivering which has come upon his whole being, was a result of a cold,the mere fact was,that he was burning.

 

  
"i have found him in the alley , almost sechs (six ) kilometers towards the north .it is his fortune,that tonight i had to guard that part of the stadt ( town ). i saw a body lying on the ground,so i have presumed ,that he was dead.and yet,after i have established ,that this man was still breathing and recognized him as your brother ....i have brought him urgently here .he needs a doctor."

  
frigga has shoved thor aside and desperately grabbed  her lost  son.as if her soul has retrieved back to her body,she herself has obatined this new strenght.

  
"oh ,loki you are safe now!"

  
thor smiled a bit...his mother would not cope easily with an another loss...perhaps she would not,at all..

  
sadly,so ,loki was the one who was  requiring some extra balance,or better yet a warm bed,so she has taken a role of a support(er) ,a physical support and let him inside,where the temperature was just right.and the fire place...even the fireplace was greeting him full heartedly.

  
"heimdall,i owe you.i mean it."

  
"not at all. it is my job ...to look out for the members of the higher soical rank .especially since all the robberies have begun .many have lost their jobs.the factories are taking jotun from the camps ,instead of the workers which they would have to pay.do you know what was your borther doing there and in that late hour.?"

  
the only son of odin,swallowed hard and couldn't look directly into the guards eyes.he was not much of a liar...

  
"my father has died few days ago. we have buried him yesterday,and loki ...he didnt take it so well."

  
"hmm...i should say so. when i found him,he was mumbling some nonsenses."

  
"nonsenses?"

  
"he said that he surrenders.that he expects me to kill him,for he is a jotun.. "

  
"oh, just like you have said .an utter nonsense ...he is sick and .."

  
"yes.it is probably nothing.i wish you a good day herr odinson."

  
"ja (yes) ,you too heimdal. danke (thank you).auf wiedersehen."

  
the guard waited for the doors to close,before he has turned again... and he narrowed his eyes.

  
"not today,not tomorrow,..but one (tag) day...there is no hidng from the wahrheit (truth). whatever the truth might be."


	10. Out Of Mind  And Out Of Sight

thor s mind has never worked in such a fashion nor it has traveled to this foreign realms...where he saw nothing but death itself .the death of his father ,the one who said that he will always be there to protect him and his mother...and now it seemed like the cruelest untruth.the death of his mother...who was no longer young and her strength was leaving her more and more ,as each day passed .and it was occurring before his very eyes...the death of the once thin ,insecure, pale boy with the long dark eyelashes which framed his wide curious eyes...and finally,his own death...to a considerable an extent ..thor was protected...from the harsh realism .at the present, he was the one who had to protect. he was the head of the family.

it was unbearable...all of it...thor was not raised in an inimical an environment,well he was not able to specify it as such.despite that he had to undergo his father wrath on the numerous occasions...but that was then...thor had a normal childhood,if that would be the proper term, for he was secluded from his mothers arms,upon the day, when odin brought forth his final resolution ,a carefully planned decision ... that, there was no more place for a boy in his house. and for a boy to develop himself into a man ...a transformation must take place. a transformation which will merely be formed,when the mentioned boy, lets go of his mothers skirts and ,so...

his mother was running after the car in which the nine year old thor was being drove away.into the frightening wide world.....he recalled that his father's volkswagen stopped in front of an old inhostile building."the boy s boarding school"..the sign on the board have said...it would have been the jail itself,for there were no genuine distinctions ...so sterile...stringent...however he has found a way to suppress his nostalgic suffering ..a fragile light at the end of the tunnel..in the from of friends...it was the most unlikely place to meet someone who would understand him,but,ironically it was the first place for meeting such a creatures .for they all were here against their will. until this dark day ,their friendship and loyalty to thor was questionless...now, there was a deep concern...if they do learn the truth about ...loki...will they turn their backs upon him.what was the price of the loyalty? of the friendship?

frigga was changing loki's bandage and was not leaving his sight,regardless of how it was reflecting upon her own health. thor paced his brother s room..his thoughts were thus loud,his mother would glance at him every few minutes.. .as if she possed the skills to read this troublesome mind.  
"he can not stay here anymore,mutter."-he has resentfully murmured,while starring through the window. those bricks,chimneys,smoke ,train...the permanent termination of all that would cause the sensation of the carelessness and joy .

"he is unsafe here,and he will bring numerous and very serious problems to our doorstep .if the word,the rumour do spread,there is no telling what...."  
frigga was drying the sweat from the forehead of the lying man,and nodded ,more to herself than to thor...  
"did you not hear me?"

"yes...i have,thor.but look at him?where would you take him .he is unable to sit .not to mention,to walk."

"i thought about it,and what it comes to my mind,is grandfather s bor s old weekend cottage ,up in the switzerland s mountains.."

"you would take him there?for how long?what would you say,why has he neglected his...working position?"

her son has spread his arms in an exasperation...when he was missing the right words,the compensation that would take place was mostly filled with the loud tone or unnecessary gesturing .throughout his existence he has discovered the truth was the best type of a lie .it worked for him,mainly.

"thus the truth,mother!he is ill and will take some time off ,before he recovers completely.out of sight out of mind."

frigga sighed as her headache suddenly reappeared.

"thor...you cannot truly hold onto that old saying .people here...they are far from being virtuous...and they will be observing and controlling loki's every move. it does not matter if he is here or somewhere else.."

"i know my colleagues...trust me."  
............................................................

 

                                                  

                                                                             

 

 

fresh air...such a fresh air...his head was continuously hurting for a primarily several days after his arrival in the classical bavarian cottage,for his body was used to the thick smoke and smog ,throng of the grey capital city...or the same from that other place...but this was the peace for which he thirsted ...this unexplainable real dream and a wonder of nature...his bedroom had one round window from which the view was leading too the mountains trapped in the everlasting snow.here, he would be woken,not by the furious sound of a clock alarm or someone s yelling...but by the sun rays....childishly playful sun rays that caressed his cheeks...and the birds...

his servant eir would bring him a piece of home made black brot ( bread ) with some goat cheese and warm milch (milk).he ,at the time of packing ,had strangely ,enough self-possessiveness to bring his cigarettes along.for here one would have to walk kilometers to the first village ... loki could not drive...much less ...walk.

no civilization near,and yet this was the most civilised place he has set his eyes upon. and yet the world of men was still upon his persona.there was no escaping it.he was comfortably sitting in the bed,under the layers of wool,and yet, he was strongly uncomfortable.holding those papers that meant someone's death,would affect him in thus way. obligations,musts that were hanging on his neck...to sign the documents,make schedules for clint...or to prepare the plans for his own prosperous future in the office.all was quite hideously daring.  
he has put down the paper and the pencil and let himself fall in the largest imaginable pillow...oh,how he would love to tear this document apart...

"i am naming ____ for the role of the commandant of the camp "asgard".

the main office was waiting for an answer...and to keep them waiting was not in question .they needed an answer-now.he has physically recovered, but his mental and emotional state has caged him inside this walls...he refused to eat or move...he wanted to sleep, to dream and to forget...all of it...and then he would dream of the odin s schrecklich (horrible) letter...the tears of his mother...the shock in the bright turquoise eyes of his aesir non-brother...

he has gravely depreciated thor .the blond odinson has proven himself to be a greater man than many.what does the jotun s book say about those with the lack of knowledge? that they shall find it in kingdom of heavens...for the knowledge here is a curse...and was not that the actual truth?  
and yes ...he has dreamed of her ...of the engel (angel) which was his sigyn...he would wake up in sweat and whisper her name...the anguish he has put her through...oh,forgive me sigyn...forgive me...

that paper had his full attention once more. if he appoints clint as his successor and gives him his position,then sigyn ...would doubtlessly -perish ...if she has not already...  
it has been few months...if there is a way to save her,perhaps there is way to save the others ..of his kin...and perhaps he will purify some stigma from his rotten soul.but he must act quickly,if there is still time...

"eir!"

"i am here,herr odinson.haben sie etwas brauchen? (do you need something?)".

"i am leaving today! packe meine sachen (pack my things!)"

......................................................................................................

upon his return to the camp ,clint who was aiming for the promotion, became visually displeased.was he to crawl under loki supervision forever?nepotism ,that is what this was! nepotism!"

"willkommen (welcome) ,herr od..."

that was the most sour smile one might have,and a truly bitter one,if loki might have add.

"clint."

herr commandat has cut him off,of course.  
the shorter man,clint detested this indirect undervaluing of his ego and class.never was he greeted properly by this an artificial snob.  
however ,herr commandant could not bring himself to care any less about the officer,for he was carefully observing the terrain in the search for any trace of the golden haired girl. and nowhere she was to be found.


	11. Hoping Again

"wurmer (worms) !"

"they have found the worms!"-a mad commotion was at hand,and the women and children from her barrack , gathered in a ranting rapidity in the yard .it was raining for days and the natural disaster has granted them with this exquisite variant meal. a litter of worms.

"wonderful ,a feast."

a young woman ,who was sleeping on a bed above sigyn's retorted, almost accusatively .the bed was not a bed ,per se,but a board with some sordid ,stained straw upon it .virginia was a practical woman,as she would described herself and her critical attitude towards all and every ,was either an entertaining or a painful reminder of some sort...when sigyn was casted away from her master,virginia was the first person she has befriended .aside from the an overall circumstances,sigyn was fond of her keen spirit and almost a masculine -like mentality. but what was a desirable an escape once , now was tiring it,and virginia s humor was turning into a caustic sneer.

it has been months ,only months..but to sigyn it was a year,at most...  
the officer barton , has foremostly taken her to the cleaning room...she was stripped of her clothes and was ceoercive to wash with the cold water.one woman,one of her kind has gave her a small piece of a soap...since those things were not so easily found around here,sigyn did not want to know the paths which this very object has travelled until it got in her hands.she was given a striped shirt and an old skirt.also,the former owner or owners of the said objects were a mostly undesirable subject matter.

"that is all you will be needing!"

the female supervisor ,an unreasonable brute ,if judging by her frozen looks, of this procedural an indoctrination,has uttered loudly .it was not merely directed to the blond haired girl ,but to all of them.all of them who were ashamed,afraid,with the wide eyes and glances full of an unspoken questions and an abandoned hopes.  
then ,after being dressed appropriately ,in the thin cloth ,especially for the temperatures under zero ( according to the celsius),she was thrown into the hands of the thin lipped woman with the rusted scissors...sigyn could only share the watch with the other women,as their long locks were falling around them...it was a preventative against the lice . they said .dependable if the person above them held a scissors or the shaver, the prisoners would leave the room bald or with the short haircut , unequally cut .both sigyn and this woman with a chestnut hair had luck...they ended up only with the shorter hair.  
the last step was to receive a shovel and to start digging ...in the remaining days they will be allocated for the factories. yes,they were the lucky ones.  
the other woman was by sigyn s side,and smiled at her...as if they were in an another place and time...not here...knee deep in the mud,freezing...

"hey !" she said..

"cheer up...nothing lasts forever .by the way ,icah bin (i am ) virginia."

"sigyn."

the other one whispered nervously.,for she saw one of the guards approaching .and the guard never had an empty hands...  
around the 9 pm,when there was no more light,the women retrieved to the old shack ,the one ,which they could not call their home,even if it was their only an imaginable shelter. there was nothing but beds....behind the shack was the toilet,or a hole...and they did took turns...when there were no guards in sight.

"so,what is your crime?" -virginia was leaning over from the bed above .

"i know why she is here ..."-said a brunette ,maria.

"the commandant got tired of her .and she thought that she is better than us!well,now she has lost her good looks ..."

"pay no mind to her.she was working at a private firm,until the asgardains  killed her director and dragged her directly here.she didnt even had the time to say goodbye to her family.she is just jealous. and bitter. "

"why are you here?"

asked sigyn tiredly.  
"i moved here ,from the states.my father got a job in deutschland (germany) .but sadly he is...was a jotun,so.."

"that is to be my schuld (blame) ,as well."

"tell me ,is it true,that you were odison s...um...close friend.?"

"no! absolutely not ! and that is the only reason why i am here. i didnt want to...."

"oh, ich sehe ( i see) ...."

maria was back,she was pacing in circles,and had that stern ,almost frightening appearance:"ha! then you are even more stupid than i thought you to be .you have had your chance to save yourself ! but ,no! that was beneath you ,little princess! now dont let me see you weep!"

"maria,leave her alone!"

"ha! fine with me .she will die soon,anyway."

........................................................................................................

so sigyn waited to die,but she would open her eyes upon every day ,at five am when the guards would slam the doors ...after the first five days in the mud ,she was sent to work on the sewing machines...the uniforms for the asgardians soldiers were a indispensable...one mistake and...the women who did not knew how to sew...sigyn would dig a hole every morning and when she returned form the factory,the hole was covered up again...she would averted her gaze from it.  
the men were separated from the women with the tall wire fence...one day she ,in the group of men ,who were waiting in line ,saw someone who might be familiar.this man reminded her of theoric...and her eyes would search for him every day...and every day he was too far away...she was not sure...but the hope was there...yet again.

 

 

...................................................................

yes, the hope was there again,until now...herr commandant was here ,and had sought for something or ...someone...she must have been mistaken,surely he has no interest in her.not anymore.  
they were in line...and the meaning of a line was a demand for an order...and an apartenss from the life...it was amis...one way or the other...loki crossly walked between them.where was she ?he has seen all these women from the n-th time,and yet he could not find her.

"nummer (number ) 08808!"

he yelled!-"step out!"

and so she did.  
loki s teeth clentched, so that his mouth would not move ...this coud not be sigyn,for this girl seemed so much older, she was also was very thin ,and her short greasy hair was of the color grey.

"is your name sigyn?"

the she looked at him,and she did not had to answer.for those large crystal eyes have stayed the same.as much as the hate that had shone within them.


	12. Nicht Mehr

"once upon a time,in a land far, far away ...in the beautiful kingdom ,there were a princess and a handsome kinght .they loved each other very much...then one day ,an army of an evil warriors have attacked their castle and took the princess...."

"and what happened to the knight ?is he alright? will he save the princess?!"

"we will find out that tomorrow.now go to sleep."

"aber,mutti...(but, mommy) !"

"this was the fourth story for tonight.no more,now-go.to sleep-!"

one of the woman was telling her daughter a different story or a plural of the same, every night...and in sequels...

"you will hear th rest of the story tomorrow...tomorrow...tomorrow..."

"tomorrow.."-she would say...as if there was a "tomorrow." it was a clever trick to help the child skip her time in the sentence,and direct her thoughts onto something positive and an inspiring..her mother would compare the asgardians to the evil warriors and,her,of course to the lovely princess...and the girl strongly believed that the knight in shining armor would rescue them all...an allegory....but was the child aware of that?.nevertheless...the other women would listen to her tale telling ...and afterwards many would drift into the creations of their own minds woven from the sweet lies and fantasies...

sigyn would turn to the other side of her hard bearing.her whole body was sore,and skin was being irritated . some got the lice ,or worse...the prince and the princess fairy tales...she didn't want for the children, the least of of all , to see her indulging herself in the most self centered and an unrestrained way and wallowing in sorrow..she was selfish.they should cherish this moments,while they still have a moments to cherish and she was ruining it for them.she was to spend another night  like this...she had no real purpose...not as a irrelevant mortal ,not as a manifestation of a creature ,a greater being ,who was to watch over them ,to take care of them...but she was selfish,lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly and solely on her own misfortune...she had not the slightest right to cry...

what of her traumatizing compilation of previous frights ,assembled into one large disaster ,in the words of a laic,what of hers previous day....the respectable commandant was back,thus the camp will soon be more spacious....and he has let his eyes of a serpent to examine methodically the proportions of the outcomes,which his punishments has left on her.as if he was not glad with what his honorable and divine self has been introduced with, he made an expression of an utter disgust and turned around in one rapid and an uncaring move.good. also,sigyn has caught maria in the corner of her eye.the brunette she was holding back a laugh.the only thing she was left with is to detract her own distress and relish in that of the others.

.............................................................................

 

 

no,loki was far from being disgusted when it came to sigyn...he felt the disgust of himself alone ....she was the product of his misdeeds...when their eyes have met,it was absolutely unbearable...the guild was absolutely unbearable... and yet, he had to show no signs of the disapproval of how she or anyone else was being treated. his head was lifted ,leaving the petite girl down bellow him,as if she was nothing... and he calmly looked around...the death walked among these sad creatures,and he was able to sense it.

"this one,this one..." it has said...

"tomorrow,today...in a week...the cause? an illness...beating...a bullet,....the gas...."  
now to perceive them them with this new eyes...they were not foul ,repellent enemies...they were deplorable deliberately destroyed people..people...the shame was overpowering him,and he felt he was losing his breath...he is suffocating and he had to get away,run as further as possible .and before it was noticeable.he has passed by clint,and his officer had that look...suspicion was a dangerous foe. the beginning of ones end...and clint knew where to search for the right information.where and how to dig up the most vile secrets and sins...that is how he climbed up to this position...literally, thought the mud and thorns...but not his ones .not to be mistaken ,for his own filth was yet to be discovered.  
loki entered his office,and sigyn breathed out.

...................................................

"herr selvig ,i require you to do something for me."

"anything, herr commandant.may i say,we are very glad to have you back."

"thank you,however i do deeply doubt that .regardless of this favor...what i need from you is a complete and an uttermost discretion."

loki s brown was raised high,and selvig s head was lowered a bit...

"why,yes certainly,ich verstehe (i understand) ...anything you say, will remain strictly among the two of us.i will tell no one. rest assured sir."

"then you better not.because,if i even hear that this little pact of a confidentiality has leaked outside this four walls..."

when the dark haired commandant was threatening ,one was sure of that.and herr selvig saw,with his own two eyes ,what the younger odinson is capable of.

"herr odison,bitte...i may be an old man,but i am not an old fool".

"very well...i need of you to find me two names...helblindi and býleistr laufeyson.two brothers...they might be in the archives ,or in the archives in the other camps ,or they might be even present here,as we speak ..."

laufeyson..."

selvig has wrote down...

"a prisoners,if i may presume .i will get right on the work .who are they,if i may ask,sir?"

"no one.that is all you need to know."

 

...................................................................  
...the officer clint was an ever present statue which defies even the worst environmental disasters..  
he has coldy saluted his superior.

"release,herr barton."

"what is our schedule for today,herr commandant? there is an enough space for the 200 jotuns,and where are struggling and are overcrowded with the 326.the office has sent the telegram in which they are expressing their concern of this problem. they are urging us to solve it by the the end of the following week."  
loki coughed...for if he did not did it,he voice would be shaking and revealing......

"nicht mehr."

"no more?"

"no more of an annihilation ....for this week,at least.they should get rid of the decaying flesh,and besides ,the factories are screaming for the labor .and we do have the finest ones?do we not?on the other hand,there is some space for a certain..an addition to the salary.unofficially ,of course...we provide them with men...quality connections will get you anywhere.and those without them ,do not sit in the leather chairs with the titles,such as the directors or owners of the factories.not in these times."

client smiled through his teeth -"natürlich (of course).."  
.  
oh clint knew where this was heading,and he was about to test his superior s judgement.or lack of thereof.

"does that include the number 08088?"

"nein,nicht mehr...(no,not anymore)."


	13. Opposite Of  Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I WILL BE USING STEVE AS THEORIC,so dont get confused

sigyn sat on her bed.bed as an descriptive phrase such as an epithet . it did brought the domestic atmosphere to this stall. ..but the floor made of the good old soil was more comfortable...she and the few girls ...children,not girls ,per se, were left alone...also those two older women ...others were being drove to the near by factories...  
with the return of that wicked scum odinson,the new orders / laws were in force... and her life was hanging by a thread.it was not some new discovery ,of course,yet now she was more conscious about it than ever before.more workers were being wanted...they would leave at dawn and would come back at night...she,however was ,for indeterminate motives not allowed to join them anymore,she was not permitted to work...what was his plan...

will he send her to that ...chamber,for he seems , to find her unfit to work...officially . was his revenge still something he found it to be so diverting,amusing ...he was stepping on her and will remain to do so,until there is nothing more left to step upon...the girls were playing in the mud, drawing with some sticks and those old women were talking to themselves,not to one another,but to themselves alone ...and that's how the day went by...

surprisingly enough, there were no gunshots to be heard in the last couple of days...yes,they were called in order ..and were made to do an unhealthy amount of disposing ...of everything and everyone...but ,there was no more disposing of them.and sigyn was not the only one to recognize the disorder in this pattern...and she did heard the birds...maybe that is a sign...maybe the war will finish soon...maybe the asgardians were not allowed to commit homicide anymore...  
her friend,virginia would radiated when she would returned from the factory...the woman who accompanied her , had formed small groups and were sending the lethal glances over to her.

"hallo,mein liebe (my dear) sigyn!"

"du siehst glucklich aus(you look happy) . are they drugging you in there...? i have heard that dr. von doom was testing some horrible medicine or other substances in other camps. "

"oh, no...perhaps it is time to tell you...mmmm...the owner of this place,where i work, is an italian...."

she had the widest smile imaginable.it would suit her perfectly ,if they were not in this so very real horror,but somewhere outside, in the normal world,far from here. in here ... she just appeared to be pathetic.

" um...lets just say that i dont work in the factory,but as his an assistant."

"assistant or..."assistant" ?"

"are there any differences, really?"

"virginia!are you mad!? what if someone finds out?!"

"like who? and do not play coy with me . you did the same . besides i do like tony ,and he actually respects me.i am helping him with the accounts,translations,... he doesn't speak asgardian very well ...and some other matters...."

"you are calling him tony?"

"hm,italians,what can i say..."

sigyn has shook her head in a defying way..

"this doesn't bode well...and will end in one or two ways."

"that is your opinion.and you are an entitled to it .but do not underestimate me ,sigyn,for i am not from yesterday .as if i am counting on some marriage.even if the circumstances were somewhat more preferable ...he is definitely not the type ,who would settle down ...you should also consider of grasping your chance while you still can..."

"i am not sure whatever do you mean ."

"since you are not working...who knows what will be in store for you on the next day . so you must play with the cards you have."

"i am sorry,i dont follow.."

"oh,but you do.if the commandant wants to get rid of you... then you should seek for protection somewhere else.and dont think i didn't saw how that officer was looking at you."

.......................................

the following day should have been the same...but her resolution to listen to that an immoral an advice was being put to the test...her own test...with her two hands on the fence she watched the other side of the camp, where the men were stationary.. how little of them have remained ...the officer was not far behind her...and she could sense his eyes on her ....but her primary worry was ,were the whereabouts of the ceratin blond man...with whom she has spent her childhood with...if he was alright ,then she will fight for herself ....if he was not...then ...

 

                                   

 

 

the black boots were approaching from behind,but she was still gazing far ahead...  
yes ,that could be theoric...he was being sent to the factories ,as well...  
she leaned her head on the fance and shed a tear...if that indeed was him,the all was well...

"du (you) ,why arent you with the others...?"

asked the officer...shouted the officer...

"herr commandant has said that i must stay."

"hmm.."

clint tookthe notice of the beautiful sigyn ,on the same day when loki did ...but his superior had the an advantage...pity...now ,if he takes the girl...under his own...he would save/ preserve her ,surely ...nevertheless, it would also mean, that he was feeding of the scrapes from loki's table...decisions,decision,decisions...

"do you know someone there?"

he pointed the gun to the fence ...

"no."

"then,what is preoccupying you so much?"

sigyn was prepared for that an inquiry ...

"they have more essen ( food) ,herr officer."

"o...they have to work more.you do know that dont you?"

it was not said in a fashion of a scrutinizing,where the ending means would be to establish more about the girl,nein. he was adressing her the way he percieved her. as a lower organism.

"yes."

"you should make yourself useful too, if you dont wish to end up on that pile over there. i disapprove of the settlement of herr commandant. if it was up to me ,more of jotun garbage would be lying there and perventing the wind from blowing on this side. "

"i would be very grateful if you would give me the chance to work,officer."

"there is button on my unform that needs to be sewed on."

sigyn nodded amenably...a button...it sounded just as appaling as it was...

"folgen sie mir in mein büro (follow me to my office )..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what should happen to sigyn?should she be rescued or...?


	14. Never Look Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so another shitty chapter.sorry...if sybil silverphoenix will read this...i am so sorry...it came out wrong but i didnt say...i was bored,but i was boring...coz i am...i suck...

                                                                               

 

 

the candles were burning inside...the vague light was visible through the dusty windows. the women must have returned from the factory,...was it so late?the night has fallen,but still...this would be the first time that sigyn wasn't not welcoming them to the majestical shack of theirs.she has wrapped her scar around herself,also tried to adjust the shirt and cover the torn parts of hers yet chronic clothes...  
the doors produced a crackling sound.a revealing crackling sound.there was no passing ,entering or exiting anywhere unnoticed .no where to find a bit of peace of mind...or just the plain peace.

"sigyn !where were you...i thought that..that..!i was fearing of the worst!"

 

"i am quite alright ,virginia.i...i had to sew..."

something else was also revealing...her shivering ,small voice,and the shame...the eerie shame ,which was written with the capital letters all over her face .figuratively speaking ,however not one single person in the radius of 10 meters could fail to observe and take notice of this disgraceful disclosure.sigyn has fallen from grace...which was meant for an every individual to grasp the true meaning of  it.all eyes were scattered upon her,and hers were on the floor...somewhere ,anywhere...where the dark could hid their epitome .she had to look away even from her friend. especially from her friend.

"sew?"

"yes...the officer,..her...he needed me to.."

what was the point of wasting the words and telling the lies...really...they were parched, transparent as an apparition of a dead ones,regardless of her desire to practise her own inner strength. she had to memorise that she was was not alone in this ...not the single wretched one ,who has sunken so low.it was the price of the time itself ...of her life...grit your teeth...lift your head up high...walk on... and never look back...this was the motto of them...the women from the shack number 9.  
virginia s long hands have found their way over sigyn petite frame and held her gently...as if sigyn was made of the thinnest glass...virginia whispered to her softly...

"sh-sh...it is alright...it is alright...the first time is the hardest...soon you would not care anymore...listen to me , sigyn...he will get what he deserves...everyone does... until then..  
kopf hoch ... mach weiter (heads up...walk on) ....."

"nicht zurückdrehen (..and never look back..)"  
sigyn ended the thought.  
......................................................

it would not occur until the exact fatal hour ,when the camp is entirely empty and all the workers had left in silence, with their heads lowered submissively. planning was not an obstacle or a foreign custom,for all was devised to the smallest detail. and sigyn was bound by her own dispositions for this an arrangement . barton gave her the orders - to wait for the signal...he would stop by the shack number 10 and lit a cigarette .if the he would finish it,then nothing would took place,however,if he would threw it on the ground,while it was still burnning...his modernistic equivalent to the slave ,would have to wait for exactly five minutes before she would enter his office.evading all the unwanted attention,naturally .  
..bloodless,dispassionate...and a surgically precisely arranged..it proceeded in the same tone for almost a whole month..  
..................................................

 

"bewachen!(guard)!"

a formal salute followed.

"herr commandant!?"

"where is officer barton?he has been disappearing repeatedly.it has happened yesterday and the day before,and what a surprise...he is absent right now .have you see him ? do you know where can i find him? why the hell he isn't where he was suppose to be!?"

the guards exchanged the glances...they pretend not to see the officer s affairs,but no one was thus blind ...,and when it came to their reputed,no one wanted to take the blame and snitch ...denunciation was not being taken lightly.

"well?!oh i see ,you do know where he is !tell me what have you been keeping to yourself ...subordinate?"

"officer burton is in his office,herr commandant!"

"really,and , pray tell what is so incredibly important that he has abandon his working position ?one man from the eastern camp tried to ran away.glücklicherweise (luckily), he didn't get far...barton should have been securing the gates!"

"pardon ,sir.but that is just one minor failure in securing .und das ist nur ein jotun weniger (and that is only one jotun less) ,sir.an unsignificant mistake."

"what?!only one...every single...jotun....worker brings us profit,you imbecile!"

loki swallowed hardly...the view from his balcony allowed him to unmistakably follow the whole ordeal .the man has left his group and went for the fences .climbing over them was a first level act of a bravery..or lack of good sense or judgment...stupidity....perhaps yes,perhaps no...how was loki to determine that...he still had difficulties with weighting what was the formidable falsehood upon which he has grew on ,and upon which was clinging on now ,and what was the unthinkable truth...the asgardians were still fearing him,and their behaviour ,and towards him specifically ,would fog up his mind.he himself was walking in circles...

the spikes ,tearing his skin,marking him in the most relentless way ..but the volition of a mere jotun was underestimated,for he did not and cease in his acts of trying .he didnt have the patience for both of his feet to be on the same side. he let go...leaving a piece of a cloth and blood to hang on the wire and hostile wind ....his feet carried him in an impressive speed...if it was still winter, he would surely succeed..with the storms covering his tracks...eventually he would die in the cold.but he would die as a free man..the way he died was,at least leading him towardshis freedom ...loki brusquely demanded from one one guard to solve this problem.for he,himself could not.

"he has given us orders,commandant! officer has instructed us not disturb him unless if it is a matter of life and death.."

he snapped out of his thought...ah ,ja,the subject of his slothful officer.

"oh, is that so?"  
...................................................................

the doors on clint's office were locked ,and loki spat on the unwritten formalities ,and has begun to slam onto them.

"officer barton! you have ungehorsam die protokolle (disobeyed the protocols) and this calls for some severe sanctions!"

an unrecognizable stirrings and sounds of a motion from the inside,were the probable signs that he has,indeed found his man.

" auftun ! (open up )! you have wasted enough of my precious time.i suggest that you do not waste any more of it !"

after unlocking the barrier between him and the tall dark haired man , clint peered out with his eyes wide .he was caught red handed ,clearly..but doing what?..loki s lips thinned as he saw how unpresentable the shorter one presented himself .his shirt was unbottoned , his belt was not on ...and that paleness...it might have been an after effect of the shock.this sudden discovery has pushed him from his comfort zone,and for loki,who knew all of his men equaly by name, status and charachter,clint s open mouth,which made him resemble a fish,were the most unlikely sight imaginable.so he pushed the doors away,which left clint with only one thing.to move aside helplessly.  
and there she was....sigyn...on the coat , on the floor,in the most degrading position.

 

 

                                                                                                                                   


	15. Camp s Management

loki may be quite slender,but he possessed an impressive strength as well..how easily and swiftly he has raised burton by the collar ,it was as stunning to the other two persons in the room,as it was to him ...yet ,not so amusing,especially not to the smaller man...barton s head made a fierce connection with the surface of the wall,and loki made it sure ,that it was more than once...officer growled in pain,and sigyn crouched behind the desk,and watched this sudden upsetting and surprising set of an events.

"what is the meaning of this ,barton !?"

the low guttural sound which escaped his throat shocked clint ,but he composed himself fast enough.oh,he will not give the pleasure to that cold,egocentric ,supercilious prince...no,he would not give him the taste of the victory,and solely because ,his highness was born with the silver spoon in his mouth.he takes,and he takes...well,not anymore,he will not!

"nur einige harmloser spaß ..(just some harmless fun) ..commandant."-barton responded differently .but he was,indeed not indifferent.not at all.

"fun,ha? do you know .what is the penalty for being involved in sexual relationship with their kind?! i should report you for decreasing ,not only yourself but the whole aesir race !"

"their kind,commandant.or that...girl? if my memory serves me right....you were the first one to taste what the jotuns were offering.and when you had enough ,you handed her to me ..."

loki has let go of him,but merely so that he might collect his thoughts,for he was on the very edge to murder that insolent ,preliterate primitive.

"i did not touch her!nor would i begrime myself with such a ...a...discarded wretch!"

barton smirked,the reaction from loki was the one he was having the intention of achieving...the officer of the camp "asgard" has mastered an interpretation of ones motives.if not from the gestures or the acts,the from the one thing which would reveal the truth behind the curtains .the eyes...windows of one's soul...and those jade ones,of his commander , held more secrets than the ten men would have had , and altogether .such a liesmith...,he thought...

"you are infatuated with her,aren't you,odinson,hmm...she means something to you..."

" (Ich warne dich ) i am warning you-one more word..."

"or what?! all my guards are loyal to me,not you! we are from the same class,in case if you have forgotten. a simple matter of a fact,of which you were reminding us all the time.oh ,and they will testify about your...leisure time.and not only that...you were earning something on the side and refused to stick to the requested limits .as if you want them to live...what are you,now,a jotun-lover?! wait until the main office hers about this!"

loki was a raging ...his sight thus sharp and stabbing and nostrils flattering...,but barton was correct about this ...loki was already suspicious...and without all of this ,which was burdening him needlessly ...  
he gathered himself together, although...still breathing heavily...

"you will take your stuff,and resign."

"fine, be also certain that i will do whatever it takes for you to lose your title.the first steps ,i will be taking are the ones, leading to berlin...and this is not the last you hear from me !"

 

                                                                                      

 

 

.........................................................................................

the girl squeezed her eyes tightly and braced herself .  
each time the boots would hit the parquet , she would flinched.

"sigyn, öffne deine augen. (sigyn,open your eyes.)"

this was not the demand,made as if by right ,but a polite an invitation ,made by a friend. and it could not be related to this man.

"bitte schlagt mich nicht, bitte.! (please,don't hit me,please.!)"

the tall man ,instead ,has taken off his long black coat and used it to cover her .  
she could hear his voice within her mind..

"you, filthy hure ( whore) .look what you have done!not only ,that you made the fool of my men,but you are deliberately intending to put my authority in question."

maybe he will point a gun at her...maybe he will grasp the situation...he may have her anytime he wants,she is no better than the lowest slave ,after all...what will it be...  
neither,he helped sigyn to get up and then diverted the gaze.respectfully ,for her sake.

" dress . i will be needing you in the villa again . your punishment has expired ,and there is no more need for you to stay here ."

"you...won't...kill me, then ..."

he turned and she took a step backwards...his sudden motions and an irrational mood changes were awakening the most an unpleasant dreads , of both an emotional and psychological character . and ,later on ,they would manifested as a physical ache ,which would lead to a depression , that, to the an awful decisions... and then ,the circle would continue...

"no...of course not,sigyn.."

he took a pause and she could see that he was thinking thoroughly about something .. but he was definitely not installing any confidence .

" things will be different from now on.i promise you that."

"(andere ) different... how?"

differences in the "asgard" were a one way path to the regrets and sigyn could not bear much more of all this slaughtering...not only of the people she knew , but also of her sanity and being .

he slowly walked ,with his eyes linked directly to hers...he wanted to say something...more that he was about to...when ,the phone rang...

"scheisse ("#"%$ )!what now?"

he hated those things...whatever could it be ..this was clint s phone ,so it probably had to be something remotely moral and politically incorrect.perhaps , it would have something to do with the management of the camp.

"yes,this is herr odinson?"

"guten tag,sir.i have heard that you are in bartons office,i was trying to get in touch with you ,but they redirected me to..."

"what is it selvig?i am engaged in something..."

he glanced over to the half dressed girl who was going through all the possible and an impossible future outcomes of this misfortunate relationship of theirs.  
selvig sighed,loki was always engaged ...clint barton just left his resignation on his desk.yes, the camp s an accountant was well acknowledged with this whole drama.

"the laufeyson brothers.are you still interested in them?"

loki jumped : "yes,go on!"

"well,it took a while,for helblinidi laufeyson was hiding under the verschiedenen name (different name ).it seems that his brother is not in our records,but helblinidi definitively was."

"was...what do you mean? where is he now?"

"it is a seltsam zufall (strange coincidence),sir,but that man who tried to escape today...that was helblinidi laufesyon."

the phone line was broken without a warning.

"sir,sir?"


	16. The Curiosity

sigyn held a genuine antique silver platter .the aromas of the potatoes with onion,eggs and caramelized pears were tantalizing her ,yet this fruit , prosaically,was under the prohibiting restriction to the likes of her.no,this was intended for someone else. a gentle restrained knock was all she was supposed and allowed  to do :"herr,your lunch. "

"i'll leave it in front of the doors..."

a brief silence ,and then the voice from the other side sounded out:"nein. bring it in ,and put it on the table."

 

 

her master has became a hermit.the household was barely seeing him at all...sigyn ,herself knew not,what to make of it...was she glad,doubtlessly she should have been ,but this type of a behavior was provoking only more enigmas .

loki was somewhere behind the piles and piles of the papers and old books...excerpts from the register of births,deaths ,the list from the camps...the decades old newspapers...  
she only managed to glance over them,for her former,new master would not look kindly on her tempts to learn something, especially information about someone's private affairs. .funny how the seasons were changing ,spinning in yearly circles...returning to the starting positions ...as was she. yet again here sigyn was ,as his maid...

herr commandant said,the she would not feel his rage anymore,nor that she will be treated the way barton was treating her.she was unable to object or outcry,for her pervious month has passed in a rather bland and therefore uninteresting tone.for once,she might say,she was at peace .the impression she was to obtain or renew about the clandestine camp s supervisor , has yet to grow its roots.until they find the grounds to be an acceptable ,she will play the role of an observer.a voiceless one.

the changes made in the household were against the rules.the rules which the asgardians treasured above the financial advantage or benefits. funf (five) camp s residents were scattered around the villa. the cook,the butler,two cleaning ladies and a gardener...and now...a maid. for whatever reason was he taking them from the field.was he not opposed to see them walking about,or...living...where were the other asgardian employees? it would be insane if he has freed them of their service only to...loki odinson was a challenge to read and to be categorized...and what an amusement it was to mentally snoop around and to solve his case.how valuable the diversion was in here...sir arthur conan doyle would be turning in his grave , if he would heard of hers childish logical and concluding abilities,but he will never know.

 

......................................................................................

 

the settings on the field, has gotten terribly amiss. and ever since he has received that mysterious phone call...sigyn had to cover her ears from the sounds which resounded from down there.  
every third man in line...she fell to her knees and prayed that the man she envisioned to be theoric was not among them.her prayers were protectively enwrapping themsleves among the women,children and men...she has feared to hope,but if she plays her cards right,if she doesn't resist any of the potential master's desires...maybe one day she will be allowed to ask for that man to be brought in here...no!you silly fool,do you truly wish to direct those wicked green eyes towards some undeserving man?

those enthusiastically deranged thoughts would not come to the girl earlier,but the complexity of the alternations which took place in the villa upon the hill , were a fertile soil for the mischief itself .how could she be counting upon the respect with which she has been regarded presently.? the devil before her was wearing the clothes of a man,a new man....she has heard that his father had died,and that he ,himself has been supposedly ill,but ,,,such a transformation in the whole ...no,there was something else,much deeper under the scarce stated rumors . all this files ,documents,and papers...what was the purpose of them?  
the platter was positioned on the middle of the table. right next to the window.

"seine mittagessen (your lunch),sir."

"danke schon sigyn."

he appeared to not to be in a good health...now with the body of the delegates arriving to inspect the reasons for the concerningly small number of the prisoners being disposed of , he was confounded with an enormous amount of the pressure.but her own eyes have spotted his discontent upon his returns from the camp.  
"there is not need to kill them all!"-he spoke to himself,alone in his study,in the poisoning company of his addictions...bottles and nicotine...  
the household talked,of course...while they were having their unmatched poor lunch themselves,the cleaning lady offered hers underprivileged remark.

"master odinson is trying to protect us."

"hahahaha,oh he could have fooled me.."

said the butler,as he put some butter on his toast.

"no,the delegation...it is because of them,why he has started to send people the chambers again. but he did change .i can tell...i think he has a plan."

"was für ein plan? "(what kind of a plan)?"

sigyn just entered the staff kitchen.

"when i was out there,this girl virgina told me that her employer,antonio stark is paying herr odinson a great deal of money for the labor."

"please,he doesn't need so much workers.and he certainly would not pay for us!"

"that is what i have told her back ,but she has said, that he is actually shipping them of ,over the borders ,from where they are returning to their homes."

sigyn s glass almost fell :"are you saiyng that herr commandant is aware of this?"

"ja. es war seine Idee .(yes.it was his idea.)"

"but ...why ?"

the cook smilled:"maybe,madchen ,becouse of you?who knows,ey?!"

.........................................

loki was down there...in the hell...and sigyn had the keys of the study room...will she,won't she...the temptation has started as a fragile flame and now was a fire...she had to...curiosity killed a cat...but cats have nine lives...and sigyn has spent only two of them.

she went over the titles of the newspapers ...they were mostly about the small jotun village ..then the lists...one thing that she noticed was the repetition of this one name...laufeyson...her mind pulled her back to this singular moment. then it did not seem to be of a high relevance... when through the half closed doors ,she has caught loki storing the his most precious files...

the derision shaped as an irony ...above the fireplace . not the safest of places...and with the fire burning almost every night...one brick was removable...was it this one,or...yes,that one...the rest of the files were gone,but the hole provided a sanctuary for one single letter...it was a very personal letter,it seems ...and from what she could determined...this was directed from the odinson senior ,and to his wife frigga... how would knew that loki was this sentimental,and kept some love letter of his parents in here...nevertheless...she was alone...and reading couldn't hurt anyone...right?

she sat on the desk and opened it...her face was changing as she was approaching to it s end;  
"loki has two older brothers who have escaped our men. helblindi,and bylister.make sure that he does not find them or anything about them.he is a member of our family and his past must be buried."

signy covered her mouth,and screamed internally... only.  
"loki ist ein jotun !? (loki is a jotun)?!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tony is schindler here


	17. Lilith

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry,this is what happens when i dont have inspiration.i get out of the commfort zone and make a mess.sorry

sigyn cursed the delegation,for the pack of the wild wolves would fill the house for the non specified length of time .and as the also not subtle post- occurrence ,the other inferior sort would face new portions of suffering .jotuns.but there were the two sides of every coin .with the preparations,great haste and cleaning she had all the understandable justifications for evading loki and his cutting,penetrative sight .

this strong phobia of an antithesis was palpable within every room ,yet loki breathed within the world of contrasts...as if there was no sharp distinctions between them....his dark side,and the other,whatever it was .he found himself alone to be worthy to sin and lie and then, regret and repent, when he thought no one would hear his meaningless cries for the salvation.. he alone ...not sigyn,no. she is to stay virtuous and live by the moral standards. if she would turn from that path he would know . suspect at first...but soon ,he would know. so the social game of inequality granted the maid some time to think .  
when have the radical variations in his behaviour and conductions first took place? recently...or were this self-doubts and loathing rooted so deeply that he transferred them into an aggressive response ,and against his own kind?

or was he actually afraid,as many were?he didn't kill her despite of her own bitter tongue,and currently ,he did not present anything besides a sound... disdain voice... she shook her head and returned to the dusting.there is no way she will forgive him or cease to feel the indignation for all the molestations,rudeness and all he was standing for.  
loki was there,and yet was not there...but still...his mind was absurdly active . was it an instinct or merely a reflex ,but sigyn's looks were debatable.he was observing her continuously during the last few days... as a classical controller,he would scan his room in the case if something was moved or removed.and with the an impeccable sight his inner alarm would turn on even when there was no real peril involved.but that is how he was.

loki odin...  
laufeyson...he was perhaps the last remaining living laufeyson.a deviation among the deviations .he even has sought out his brother's death... a monster.that is what loki was .his ignorance made him a monster ,but this discovery has made him realize that. and that was a true horror...he will burn in hell...sigyn would get her wish fulfilled .her golden curls have grown a bit and she commenced to resemble the muse he has met on that cold day a year ago...  
was it a year...she seems to be right ,for within this era she has had the privilege to inspect his behavioral imbalances.she may though this to be hers an advantage,but...

"sigyn, ich brauche ein wort mit Ihnen (i need a word with you)."

that velvety voice have sent shivers down her spine,and her first reaction was to obey.

 

...........................

his study recalled sigyn of the cloudless moments she has shared with theoric ,while cruising along the museums and cinemas ...the book shelves that reached to the high ceiling,a tooth of the mammoth...a copy of botticelli's "birth of venus"in the centre of the room..  
the smell of the cigarette nad the smoke surrounding him,contributed to the whole severeness of his persona. but once again his eyes were an unlike ...the destructiveness with which they had glistened was gone .there was a spark of an enormityand shame of them same coming from them...as if the foundations upon which their owner depended would collapsed with one smallest motion...his secrets made him fragile...almost as she was...and ,for the first time she did not lowered her head down .why should she,for he was no better than her.

"yes,herr?"

"i will got straight to the point,sigyn.have you been cleaning my study few days ago?on the july the 15th,to be precise?

"no,no one was cleaning it then."

"ah,so...then,why were some of my belongings removed from their original plazt (place)?"

"i do not know,sir."

"mhm---mhm--..."

he took a small object from his pocket and handed it over to her.

"this is your hairpin.is it not? i founded it on the same day when you were supposedly ,not in here."

"i um...maybe it is from the day before."

"it is not,because i have found it on my tresen ( counter),and my tresen was empty when i left. jetzt! (now!) tell me did you or did you not mess around with what i have placed for safe keeping?"

denying would not improve the whole complexity of the occasion.he would probably got more enraged and punish someone else...so an elementary denial would not count as a diplomatic answer.

"you mean the letter, sir? ja, ich habe es gelesen (yes i have read it) ."  
she jumped to the conclusions and childishly revealed herself,for he did not thought a single thought about the referred thing.  
"you...did what?!"

the untrustworthy poking in his ego and the disturbance which made his blood boil raised his hand and left a trace on her face.he would not stop there,but she confronted him with the strange determination .  
"you will never do that again,sir!"

of course ,that was a call for loki to act violently once more . when her other cheek burned as much as her first one, she did the unexpected and paid himin the same manner .she was shaking ...did she just hit him?loki s eyes have enlarged by three times...did she just hit him?

all the barriers between them were deleted through the primal behavior involving physical force .there was no more hiding,mendacities , redirection or adjourning ...it was only them two ,here and now...one moment ready to rip out the other ones eyes ,and the second...they were all over each other...hate displayed through the obscure passion of the lilith.a female demon from the jewish folklore, first wife of adam, dispossessed by eve,an aspect of the dark female sexuality.

 

                                                                                              

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in other words...angry sex.


	18. The Bell,Drink And  The Suspicion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning,tony doesnt speak asgardian very well...wellsee..i have put a story of yours if u can find it.

two pair of eyes stared at the plafond ,with their owners quite far one from another,each on the opposite side of the sofa.  
none of them possessed a wish to be the first to speak out.what was in other s ones head...that was sequential qualm .what was she thinking ?what was he thinking?  
loki turned the discomfortness into what was deemed to be the utmost element  
of the great significance and value here,for it will affect them all,in the due indefinite continued progress of existence .

"the delegates will arrive tomorrow.i guess...everything should be in order by then?"

sigyn blinked furiously and her cheeks puffed in nausea ...was he only concerned about that?! did he still truly believe to be so ignorantly momentous,a man of an elite corrupted status,who was continuously and consciously declining something,anything what would refer to the normal human being-emotions?he was not mentally ill,or did not appeared to be ,not bewildered nor ashamed ,no...he was an immune to that...a proper aesir...except that he was not!  
in the haste she buttoned up her grey dress and fixed her dropped bun.

"all will be in order...herr odinson.you do not need to worry about...anything! your lunch is served...and if you do need something besides...besides ..urgh ,just ring the glocke (bell) !"

the distression and discredit were induced ,not by her recent activities and this manifestly meaningless,however scandaouls an affair,but with how he still perceived her. oh,loki was so pathetic. he held himself to be high ,above all,yet he reached his lowest point .and what was sigyn to him ....still a jotun maid.no more and no less...he had her,and now he may return to the sterile professionalism to which he was so accustomed to.

loki followed her motions and put his shirt on...she should respect his desire to keep this whole matter as discreet as possible,and this pre adolescent pouting would get her no where. a contra an effect was all she would invoke from within him.whas she so common in grasping the potential consequences ,in grasping the bigger picture?he has though more of her....how could she not see that they all are in grave danger?

"err...no.that would be all ...you are bewusst ( aware) that..."

.."that this was strictly a business transaction .oh yes,i know all the privileges that come with being a supervisor of the camp.i would not jeopardise anyone ,not even you ...i would ,on the other hand,permit myself only to pity you."

"that is a funny thing to say,maid! i still have the power over you and every single soul in this area.and you are allowing yourself too much.do not test my patience."

"i told you once.i would rather be dead than..."

"a whore to an asgardian...well,what was this then?! when you moaned under me?"

"well...you sir,are no asgardian."

and with that,she left...leaving loki to do what he knows the best...heal his inner demons with ....his inner demons.she stopped at the hallway...  
why did she slept with her monstrous master? they both were in a need for warmth and a human touch...not barely and lucidly on the physical level...their necessity was closeness...and if that was not the revealing test ,than what was it? yes, he was modified...and if she pushes him a bit more...she laughed inwardly and slightly smiled outwardly...this was not the sigyn she knew...no...this was a modern heroine like those form the movies,which she admired ...she was greta grabo,marlene dietrich...intelligent,strong and straightforward ...and she will make changes where they count ,and leave her small mark in the world...or after her time expires .

.........................................................................................

the weapon factory was laying about 20 kms from the camp and stretched in the radius of 1000 km2. it's an ownership was passed forward from an older signore stark to his hedonistic san antonio. an italian entrepreneur ,a tycoon from toscana.loki would pay him a visit once a week,for a good measures cost ...he would be bitting his nails,right now,as he drove to his partner in crime , but it was unbecoming...signore stark was not one of those men,gentlemen who would merely correspond of the matter of the business ...no,once when he started to chit chat ,he was unstoppable.  
he was a notorious free-liver ,lover of the women and good wine...or wine in general ...his grandfather opened the factory in 1800s ...and the primal purpose was ...the cheese production ..now ,for the objectives of the war...they switched to producing weapons...and antonio stark was a war profiter...but he understood that jotuns are worthy of saving.especially the fairer sex.

"herr odinson!"

the shorter tanned man smilled as he shook loki s hand .he had unnaturally white(ned) teeth.

"buongiorno signore,come,come into my humble office..."

 

                                                    

 

loki stiffly passed among the lines of the crookbacked men and few women who melted an iron.the sounds of hammer and machines prouduced a various morbid music ,but the italian seemd to enjoy it.in fact he savored all which surrounded him.stark was one fo those hideous enthusiasts who were blind to misery,for misery could only be found on the bottom of the glass .that is why his galss was always full...loki,misfortunately was able to identify with that..  
finally they entered the office...decorated quite kitschy.

"a drink,perhaps...?"

stark offered,but he was mostly pouring into his own glass ,the rest was a sudden reminder that manners should come first.

"err...nine...nichts fur mich ,danke.may i ask where is you secretary?virginia ...i believe that is her name.i did not seen her when we arrived."

 

was she deceased,or deported....he was interested in her wellbeing...for sigyn s sake.

"oh,bella viginia.she is now signora stark".

"would you mind repeating that?!"

the way tony said it and the impact of shock on loki s face would to the third party seem like a bad comedy...a third grade chaplin s parody surely...

"si,certo! (yes.of course!)"

.grin,grin,and the biggest grin of all...was this man not supposed to be an inventor,genius?or was that to be interpreted as a sarcasm?

"are you completely verrückt (mad),herr stark?"

"oh, we did in the secrecy of course...it was a small wedding ,with some wine and pizza...and a small festino (party)".

"a party?"

"si,here in the factory."

"so, all your workers know about this transgression?!it is a felony for which you might be put in front of the wall,with blindfolds on!"

"baah,you worry too much! io (i ) understand the situation... back in italy... duce obadio sanissimo is still a puppet of the geppetto fuhrer thanos,so no...how they say... ...nessun problema (no problem)..."

"kein problem,you say? the royal air forces have begun a two-night bombing of berlin.,the jotuns in the warsaw ghetto have rose up for the first time, starting the warsaw ghetto uprising. jotuns pretending to be us,and droving through the three conutries in our uniforms...they do what we do,save others,mine freund,and that does not bode well for us.someone may suspect.the asgardian troops are evacuating sardinia, as we led this treasonable conversation. and it is a matter of the short period of time when the italy would declare a war against the aesiers.i came to warn you und ich am already risking so much ...specifically when tomorrow..."

"ah, those uptight fancy asgardians ...bene (good) i'll bring some wine,and the girls."

"from my position,it is clear,and by far ,that you do not comprehend the seriousness of the whole situation ."

"we do good things herr,war is merda (shit) . myself, i hate making guns and pistols ...when this is over ...ill make vacuums."

"vacuums...?"

"yes...they clean the house on their own .even you will like this... that way you will not be needing maids anymore.well not for cleaning at least ahahahahaha. capisci  (get it) eeeey?"

the fool of a man leand over the commandant,and winked.

"now in confidence...one of the workers is a registrar,he did me and virgnia..if you want to i may borrow him to you.you know...for you and the blonde maid.eeeyeeeeey?!"

"may i have that drink now,please?"

 

 

 

 


	19. The D -Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is less than a year befor the end of the ww2,so the story should not be lenghty...  
> your thougts are welcome,as always

"heil thanos"

  
"heil thanos!"

  
heads still and hands lifted high...the customized salutations as a molded sign of the anobedience and an affiliation to the nationalistic group , have announced the beginning of the meeting.sigyn didn't had to do much...by loki s orders...other maids would be serving those murders...conveniently ,her room shared a thin wall with the one in which the said session would be held.she has memorized the names of those eminent blood-shedders,such as the head office secretary, dr strange,doctor victor von doom,whose name was an association for the terrible experiments on the prisoners ...there was also the factory owner stark,some general barnes and few more ,whose names she didn't caught..

 

 

"we are losing it!"

a hoarse voiced man did his best to get the superior an attention.

"you are alluding ,that you are losing it barnes?"

"hey,no one was talking to you dr doom! the craziest typ (guy ) in the whole room.those chemicals have gotten to your brain!"

"calm yourselves gentlemen,there is no need for the animalistic conductions . especially since the environment is the one of the profound an aesthetic of tranquility."

"you mean,this is a nice villa?."

asked the italian.

"ganz righthes (quite right), herr stark."

the deep, whispery voice responded almost irritatedly .it belonged to sutur,a fox ,the right hand of thanos himself . not many would dare to challenge him.not directly,that is.

"nevertheless,,herren,indeed our armies are being presented with the defeats on both air and ground...and sea...which should have a far-reaching an effects...the end of the war might come sooner than we want to believe."

sigyn had her ears on the glass,which she has positioned on the wall..the voices were somewhat muted, but still the last one undoubtedly belonging to loki . she was capable to distinct it anywhere,and in anytime...and while it was as ordinarily stiff and apathetic,the smallest alterations in his accent of few words were unmasking his bravado. the bright side of this was that she was the single person who could discern this.

"the offensive on the western front of the dnieper in the ukraine forced the asgardians into a major retreat.oh,let us not forget -the air attacks in austria and vienna!"

"uh,no good!"-said tony,pretentiously feigning the disappointment.

general barnes had raised his brow...an italian was suspicious and must not be considered as an equal,for the italians were not an aesirs...why was this creature a colleague.,he didn't wanted to guess,for the world of it...ah,yes,he was loaded with money...and he saw antionio as an exclamation point in unpleasantness...the humor of this was that they both shared all the qualities and negative distinctive attributes.

The d-day...surely if that is not an indicator of the certain withdrawal,then i do not know,were you paying any botheration?!"

loki behaved as if he carried the weight of the defeat upon his back,like the mythical atlas ...the vicious eyes of others remained upon his ghostly pale face.

herr stark was not an exception at this and coolly redirected their honorablenesses to himself again..

"oh,is that the landing operation on the tuesday, june 6th of the an allied invasion of normandy in operation overlord ,which until now, is the largest seaborne invasion in history.aaaaaaaaaaand in which ,they delivered the asgardian -occupied northwestern europe from nazi control, and contributed to the allied victory on the western front. they won!...those figli di puttana (sons of bitches)!this beer ...it tastes like a piss...are you warm...hey,is it only me or is it really warm in here?"

"we will open the fenster (window) mr.stark.and we will take an intermission .it seems that we are in a need of one...desperately "-loki proffered ,and others willingly or unwillingly agreed upon it .

.....................................................................................................

"this went well...they are not suspecting anything!"

the way antonio s mouths moved , fast and he was an overly gesturing with his hands,made him resemble a ..primat. loki wanted to grab him by the neck and threw him out of the window.if herr stark s primal an idea was a distraction, he has failed and horribly.

"herr stark...you are deluded.and i do fear that someone will die tonight...and that someone might be one of us two..."

"way, it is not you fault that the stupido asgardians,no offense, are losing the war .i celebrate!that is bravissimo (very good)."

 

herr sutur invited them to join the rest ,the next part of the meeting should be an interesting one.it involves these black sheep of this round table...

"ready?herr odinson,herr stark?"

"so,one of the order of business which is to be discussed today...is the dysfunctional leading of the camp "asgard".would you care to explain herr odinson?"

"aaah,yes,well...the time i have spent in berlin,after my father s death,i took for a development of a plan which would guarantee an economical savings in our branchen (industries)."

"what the holle (hell ) is that suppose to mean?!"-that was ,of course,the general who still believed in the lifestyle that did not include a soap.

"well...general barnes...before i answer you,would you mind putting that leg of the recently polished table...thank you.now, as you said,the information gathered from the fields are mostly unwelcome.verily , our casualties are of the great number...we must ot save where we can ...both in money and men...and jotuns,nidavelirians and alfheimers are the cheapest workers on the market ...and they do work for 12-16 stunden (hours )a day."

"meinen arsch (my ass)!we need to kill those insects!"

the italian ,who himself was polished ,from head to toe, has stepped in:"seigneur bucks..."

"es ist (it is ) barnes!"

"burns...fair enough...herr commandant is right.they work good and we produce more than ever...or supplies will reach the west front in few days,not weeks ,days..."

"that is all perfectly understandable,signore,but in the war,the profit of the few is irrelevant to the profit of the nation .and if the main office decides that the 1000 jotuns should be send to the "showers",well...there is no place for any opposed arguments ,now is there?"

sigyn realized that this was probably dr strange.  
"then who would work?"

tony actually pouted.

"less jotuns."

and that was the general,again.

"no good seigneur...cinque (five )men can not make 200 guns and bullets in one hour...50 men can."

the debate has exasperatedly continued itself for an another four hours...and even through the wall sigyn could feel loki s dread ,but he tried to show none of it..  
she di bit her lower lip occasionally...what if they pull out their guns...will they...will he...was she afraid for his safety...no! she was only thinking of the other prisoners and herself.with ...yes,she was immensely selfish with every right...but still...to envision him,dead...the sight of the bullet forming his brain into a mush...

 

 

"no!"-she cried out...,

the stools in the meeting room ,have scraped the floor...they all rose up.

"jetzt die letzten worte und ein abschlussnow (now...the final words and a conclusion.).."

the fair haired maid has trew herself on her knees...was this their final hour?

"oh, gott (god),let loki be alright,and i promise i will forgive him everything ,please...!"

will her prayers help,she was about to find out,for someone knocked on the doors of her room...


	20. Tanzt Mit Mir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warning!  
> dear wellsee wanted me to do a smut...so...this is the worst one u will see...i am so sorry that this aint better,at least it is different...it is the first and ,i believe the last one...it is somewhat edited now but i am still not fine with this version.any thoughts?
> 
> p.s.i will be using lorelei as lorelei,and i forgot who is the blond actress who should be amore...

it was the butler:"sigyn you should serve them lunch:wiener schnitzel mit karotte ( with carrot ) und kartoffeln (potatoes )and some scwratzald torte (cake) ...  
"the verdict!?what did they say?"

"ich weiß es nicht (i dont know).es ist all top secret.now ,you better hurry up !they do not like to wait.!"

with her head down and humbly on her chest ,sigyn brought in the plates and served the men.they were not hungry merely for the food,for their eyes would now and then drift to her ...although that was enough to unnerve her,yet an empty chair upon which loki should be sitting,was a true cause of her paleness...how could this mean anything good?!  
she was unable to serve them anymore,for how could she held those an expensive baroque porcelain without letting it fall and smash ?.the control of her motorics was fading...,she excused herself before the dessert and ran to the next room...no,there was no sight of her master.nor was he on the hallway... .scheisse! while she was turning towards the meeting room ,she bumped onto a tall ,gentleman.just by looking at him ,she felt an uneasiness.

"um,entschuldigung,aber herr odinson has a long distance call,do you know where i can find him?"

a petty lie ...yet lies were all that was considered to be justified.

."yes...he is gone."  
she immediately recognized this despicable voice.so this was dr.doom then,she would never forget that leer nor his an antipathetic face.

"gone sir?"

"yes,he is in the bathroom."

of the relaxation she felt...heavy bricks falling from her chest,ney - mountains of frights...

"danke."

was all she has manged to say.

.....................................

loki was splashing himself with the cold water...what an awakening method of coming to one's senses..he was breathing fast and his heart was repeatedly and heavily striking ...an arrhythmia,perhaps?

"herr?"

a melodious voice came from behind,and her visage of perfection,has found its place in the mirror...she was like a creature from another dimension ,a balm ,a desired omen in this awful hour.

"sigyn,the denunciation is not an utopian one,nevertheless it is far beyond what i have hoped for .they said,that they will no longer touch women and children anymore ."

the restrainment was as surreal as the socially unacceptable paintings of pablo picasso or salvador dali...she has spread her arms and wrapped herself around him.

"oh!i am so glücklich (happy)...danke ,danke herr commandant!you have done a wonder!i will never forget you courage!i have heard...um..i mean..."

"shhhh....quiet now sigyn, contain yourself,those men are still in there.imagine their reaction !and.... bitte (please),when no one else is around,do call me by my first name."

she blushed a bit :"as you wish...com...loki".

........................................................

antonio stark would not live up to his name, if he did not had the custom of organizing a proper decdence at someone else s house.to express his gratefulness for being allowed to keep his workers,he orchestrated for the trucks ,which tranported the barrels (the finest wine (supposedly confiscated from wealthy jotuns) to stop right in front of the villa.it must have been a coincidence,yes? and what would be the true entertainment without ...the burlesque girls...those stars were highly appreciated among the higher ranked men..

and amora la amore and her younger sister lorelei le amore were the brightest ones of all .their fame streched beyond the borders of germany ... the unfortunate axiom, that they both have taken the french surnames ,did not leave a trace nor influenced their carries,not the least.their original surnames were schwarz (black),and were not appropriate ,even less refined for a world of luxury,fast cars and ...hmm...other wunderbar sins.the long haired singer amora and the red haired dancer lorelei ...though ,it was clear even for an untrained eye to see that they were not as talented ,yet the compensation for it was quite appreciated.among men...these,sisters did not share them,men,as many wanted to believe...they were rivals...what one had,another one desired...and ,strangely enough,they wanted men with deep pockets and an admirable status...

 

 

  
having them as guests or an entertiners was a rare privilege...not anyone could afford such an extravagance.herr stark,of course could,in fact ,he has payed the ladies a nice an amount for drawing the attention and flaunting ...it was a neccassity that the other guests laud and drink until they forget their decsions from the few hours ago."an aching head ,go to bed..."

starks infamous mantra.loki complacently chuckled,as he watched those generally an aloof and humorously self reserved ,and now seriously licentious shouting red faced gentlemen, as they drooled over the two an expensive...whores...when amora took a pause in between the songs,she strolled down the hall,moving her hips exceedingly and heretically .her path ended when she slided on the stool right next to loki.oh ,he has caught her eye...tall dak ,handsome and mysterious...and ,not to meantion,thats was his villa...

"hallo..".

her voice was like a spicy combination of honey and pepper ...incredibly smooth and misleading ..

"dame (lady)..."-he nodded..."may i say that you sing divinely."

"oh,vielen dank.would you belive me if i am to say that i was thinking of you ,while i was down there ,on that stage.?"

"mich (me)?really miss ,you are flattering me."

he was not about to be sold for a cheap coins.

" well who else..you herr ,are something i haven't seen before...ah,and your eyes ...you know that they do tell a lot about men?"

"and would you enlighten me ,fraulein (miss) amora? what do eyes tell about men?"

"mmm....mostly about their preformaces ....in bed ,how they are e is like....and you ,sir...i can see that you are a wild,passionate lover..."

he coughed,and before he has found any suitbale answer,.her two years younger sister appeard behind amora.lorelei was her an equal in beauty,yet not so much in tactfulness ...she would conquer her men ,for the pure sake of fun ,while amora would drain her lovers from every reason to live...it was an immpossible mission to take the ones eyes of the red haired girl...and it had to do something with the way she was dressed...or not dressed...as always ,she was quite open with her intentions.

"forgive me for interupting ,but i simply couldnt not to hear this very,very interesting coversation of yours.is my old...er sister bothering you?"

"lorelei...shouldn't you,take your bra and throw into in the public or something?."

"i already did that,you stupid! now,herr ...this is a nice house...so big,and the wood seems so hard...um...would you like to take me on a small tour...like to you room maybe...hmmm..?"

if looks could kill the red head would be dead,have no mistakes,for the poison amora sent to her little sister was unbecoming of any human creature .

loki has spot sigyn in the hallway...and what was that ...on her innocente little face-was this an envy?if it indeed was,has she finally ,realized what she might be losing?was she appreciating him more now ?having more feelings about him?lets put that to the test,shall we?

"my dear ladies,no arguments ,please...it is better if we share,yes?ill be more than glad to show you around the place ...the both of you."

the women giggled and glued themselves around the camp s supervisor...sigyn s lips pursed and she stormed back to the kitchen.

...............................................................................................................................

it was about the two am ,when the last guest made his way to the residence built for the very occasion...when the heavy burden of spilling blood or night times promiscuities would took their toll upon an elected prosperous ones.loki could sympathize... for they truly suffered.sarkasmus (sarcasm).

when one gives himself to his addictions,the one sacrifices his soul.but when the tool of his want is out of the reach ,then the one will move the mountains to get the second best...and loki's thirst for the nicotine has taken him by the hand and led him to the kitchen,which was on the ground floor. streichhölzer (matches) ,those bloody matches...they should be here...they must be in here...the turned on lights ,the clatter of the dishes and the running water ...he was not, honest to be, fond of the realization that one of the maids was there to disturb his primarily wish to have a moment alone, in an utter silence.

"still up?"

his smirk colored him with the shades ,sigyn thought to be the ones of the immorality and an absolute wrongess.

"someone has to work ,so that others can have fun."-she snapped,and his mouths made an "oh" sign.

"i had 50 dishes to clean,and now...i am finally done.there! now will you excuse me, i will be heading to bett (bed)."

 

"halt (stop) ! sigyn would you please look at me?you seem...odd.would you mind explaining to me the reasons for your cross attitude?"

cross,ha!? now she has had the arms,crossed over her chest...she still held that mop in her hands,and wouldn't she like to wipe out that an obnoxious smile off his face.

she said nothing,but her look was more than an adequate one .

"so ,you mind me having some fun,after all...how did you say ,the risiko (risk) to which i have thus sacrificially exposed myself ."

"überhaupt nicht (not at all).you may do as you please! now ...i really must be going.."

"was ist mit dir (and what about you) ,siygn?when will you have some fun?"

"when i die."

"nonesense...stay just five more minutes with me,please...i am begging you."

 

darn it...he appeared to be so young and boyish like...a spoiled child...what could go wrong...nothing or ....everything...

"in ordnung (alright..)."

..................................................................

the gramophone in herr commandant s study was playing ludwig van beethoven's"fur  
elise" ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lkcvrxj0eLY ) ,a dreamy,an enchanting spell which was given to the mankind.sigyn was carried away,on the wings of the palpable mist while this an unblemished sadness was interlacing its long threads around her.

liqueur with rum,tender light,the scent of old books and this melody...her crystal blue eyes have teared up,and as she blinked, one of the tears ,a crystal itself , caressed her rosy cheek on its way down...

"perfektion (a perfection )..."

at his words...she turned to face him.

"um,what?"

"oh.nothing...i was merely trying to find a nearly fitting word to summ the impact of the composition upon my wretched self ."

or ...of the sight before me...

"oh...yes...it is quite schon ( beautiful).und traurig (and sad)."

as he put down his fine glass,he started to casually walk towards the girl who was slightly leaned onto the table and starred into nothing...

"sigyn... would you...would you tanz mit mir (dance with me)?"

"here?now..?.this is not a right song for dancing,it more of a mourning message to a lost love."

he stretched his hand ,regardlessly..

"then,let us both mourn a bit..."

 

 

 

                                                      

 

 

why not,only one dance,a moment in eternity...which shall or shall not be forgotten,but the sensation of it appeared to be wholesome.

their movements matched the speed and rhythm of the menationed piece .slowly,gently they danced...it begun with her head upon his chest...the rest of which followed was a dream...a pleasing dream,yet so frightfully true....  
first he raised her head so that their eyes could meet...his hands cupped the sides of her face as his thumbs caressed its soft features,just before  his lips have lustfully claimed hers full warms ones...a kiss sealed in grief,passionate dislike and deep affections....her hand rested upon his heart...she could feel its beating...in a way she could feel him...as if he was her s....under her possesion.

loki never stopped looking deep in her eyes...he wanted to scratch his way down to the very source of her soul...her eyes beaming in this light like jewels and her lips trembled with yearning.he lowered and narrowed his head,so that he might thrill upon her an exquisite neck...those beastially playfull small kisses have made her a slave to her own betrying body as her breathing hitched.....even her hands found no restrictions...in a way,this was them against the rules of the wicked world....when she started to unbutton his flawless shirt his large hands went beneath her skirt ...

he pulled down the her poor lingerie in one swift move ,and his touches teased her by going slowly upwards and starting from her kness,then thighs....

"oh,gott.."

he stopped just before he reached her womanhood ,and returned to the dance...now he keenly observed her...sigyn understood...he needed her permisssion ,and would give a partial an advantage to his fae like mistress...sigyn gave in and released him from the strictness of his shirt,of the suit and the stauts behind it ...then she went on for the pants...when those too were untied,he closened them for the one last time..

  
. embedding and stimulating her body...as their hips and groins were causing frictions...she felt every move,every stroke...and yet they still did not broke the eye contact...her lips were red and parted ,which was a guidence for loki to return his hand under there....with the gentle massaging of her lower lips ,which were eager and prepared...awaiting and wet ...she shut her lids as he cautiously entered her...the music was still in the background somewhere...everywhere...he held her tightly as they turned ,and their steps were not ceasing,but were bettered with his rhythmically thrusting and the sounds of their breathing...back and forth...she grasped forcefully upon his upper arms...

there were the negative sides of making love during the dance,even though , it was thus devilishly close to be a celestial sensation ...her motions could not match his,for he was evidently taller than her ...so she wrapped her legs around his waist ,and pushed herself onto him...this should enable him to carry them to some solid surface...she would imagine that to be the desk or the counter,but loki's mind worked in another fashion...a creative one or a dominant one ....

without breaking them apart ,he found a support in the wall...sigyn relaxed as his strength deemed to tripled now,and his position,slightly beneath her ,was more than an acceptable one ..while holding onto his musculed shoulders ... yes,now she could feel him completely...loki would lifted his hips and pierced inside of her ,and all the way...only to hear her produce those sweet sounds of the real satisfaction ....those mones and gasps have awaken a demanding possessive demon within him...and by far, this position was not a spontaneous one....sigyn was his...and while he held her as he was impaling her to the very core...she was his...no man could or will pleasure her like this..when her head went backwards ,his thrusts became faster ...and faster...she was close,oh so close...ther was no denying of this bliss...she was lost for the entire world...nothing could prevent her treacherous body from experiencing the ecstasy in its fullest.sigyn screamed as the wave of profane an electricity has overtaken ,paralyzed her and then forcefully radiated through her body .that has sent loki over the edge, as if he only waited for this little morte of hers...as if he was the owner of her life... he released himself deep within her.loki has given himself completely to her,as a compensation of taking her mind ,body and soul...

finally,exhausted and weary ...on the edge of their strengths,and with their still warm bodies ,entangled on the red carpet of the study ,sigyn has questioned him in a whisper:"have you ...danced like this...with those girls?"

"nein,meine liebe sigyn ...nur mit dir.......(no, my dear sigyn, only with you)."

 


	21. Death Vs Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> only one or two chapters to go. i wanna thank all of your for reading this stupid story,it means a lot...i have put some effort in it ,and your support is what is pushing me to continue...
> 
> also dear author eyeless soul started writing a fic after my vids:http://archiveofourown.org/works/3739306/chapters/8289934
> 
> the vids-part 1:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pJM6iAiUb4  
> part 2:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb8Kc1ppX9Y  
> part:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddEY6x_H2hw  
> part 4:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q97hZxFyrpw  
> part 5:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftX43ezsLqY
> 
> plsread the descriptions under vids...and for all of thgem go here-https://www.youtube.com/user/pritispuki/videos

 

 

the remarkable feeling of his breath upon her neck,his unconscious motions under the blanket...that shared the couch and the dreams ...it was both satisfactory uncomfortable and , confidently convenient...sigyn idly hummed ,at the sensation of his arm bringing her closer to him ....they were partially awake .,squeezed tightly together... it was less than they have bargained for ,but more when it came to the person for whom they have bargained for .  
that evil,mercilessly ticking thing right above her head ,reminded her that the time for dreaming has met its end .her hand reached that persistent harasser of a clock ...the estimation,by which that it was barely sieben (seven) am made her reteun to her rest...she will be damned if she even considers of opening her eyes,for in his warm embrace she would stay until the end of days...

 

.................................................................

 

"aim and.. fire !"

...she jumped to her feet...the sounds that ripped through the third and fourth dimension have thoroughly shook her ...she dressed rather momentarily and went towards the balcony...no,this can not possibly be taking place..no,not after everything to which they seemed to agree upon...

the camp on the right...the thick smoke floated above it , as one of the plagues from an ancient egypt..the red bricks formation has hid the sickening sight from her,however she stood in the first row of the, not the least theatrical piling up of the bodies ...

loki was dressing himslef in a slow pace ,weary and visually not overly rejoyceful or much interested in having the following discussion.

"what is this!?sie haben mir gesagt, dass sie die gefangenen in ruhe lassen (you have told me that they will leave the prisoners alone)!"

he rubbed his eyes and started putting on his leather ,light reflecting boot. his orientation point was, obviously the carpet,the opposite direction of sigyn s reddened face.

"i told you that they will not touch women or children,...doch, was ich waren nie erwähnt die männer (yet ,what i never mentioned , were the men)."

she was pulling her own hair out,due to this unpromising position...it was hopeless...all went back to the inception..

"no!no! and no! why haven't you been honest?! for once?!"

loki glanced at her for a dozen of second and started to fiddle with the other boot..

"because i knew that you would react like this. the less disturbed you are ...the better ...for all of our sakes."

she gasped and her lips turned downwards..which only deformed her proporcional visage.

"you...you arschloch! you have planned all this,havent you...was it merely to sleep with me...no,it goes deeper than that...it excites you to be a superior master and me..an ignorant slave...the third option is that you did this out of the revenge...a cold served one...becouse i have declined you the first time ...well thank you!now i see your true colors!"

"yes sigyn,that is exactly how it was...my intention of submitting you through your lack of an information .do we need to go through this?again? now,when all cards are placed on the table,it is your turn to be honest with me. you speak of depth ...and ,i do believe there is deeper level of your solicitude when it comes to those men.my dear sigyn, looks me in the eyes and she tells me ,she doesnt know a soul from the camp on the right...that,of course is not true.,is it? is it?!is there someone you so eagerly want to see ?"

"das ist keine Ihres unternehmens (that is none of you business)."-the time for deceptions is over...and many other things along with it...

she ran ,before loki s mind cleared enough to try and catch her...down the steep road which was at least one km long...her flat shoes carried her over an asphalt ,then mud,then feces, and staganant blood...then she stopped at the great wide obsticle...the wire fence...

"theoric!theoric!please,if you are there ...answer me!"  
..................................

there was no reply...the ghosts walked through the house ,the ghosts of the dead and the living ones...in the months which would be a shameful continuation of the unsightly actions and monstrosities ,the retaliation for the continuous loses against an alliance armies , has painted the grounds red and skies black.quite literally ,again.

\-----------------------------------------------

the molestations in the stark s factory became a daily routine...the guards would arrive at anytime of day or night and would use the force to take the workers away...some were killed outside the factory ,others were shipped back to the "asgard " or other camps...loki ,himself has received a warning before the dismissal .he would gladly leave all of this behind,but what would become of sigyn then...

...........................................................

"schneller laufen! schneller schneller! "

the guards pointed their guns at humbly dressed men and women ...the were to fill the wagons again...their fate was...more the one of a known ,than an unknown one ...

"macht schon! voran!los, los, los! schneller!(come on! Ahead! go, go, go! quickly)!"

"no! no! hey! hey!what are you doing ,si grande stupido?"

the guard frowned at the italian entrepreneur .

"questi sono miei (these are mine)! these are my workers! they should be on my train!they're skilled munitions workers! they're essential!essential girls! their fingers polish the insides of shell metal casings.how else am I to polish the insideof a 45 millimeter shell casing?you tell me.you tell me!"

"this are the orders from the top,herr stark! now,go back inside ,if you know whats good for you."

"euch alle gehen zurück (all of you )back on the train!"

................. ............................................................

and time stood still...when life was drained from sigyn,life was drained from loki as well .. through all this time while she was with him,her thoughts...and heart were with this theroic...without any consideration of their owner s personal state ,loki s thoughts continued to have fun by making him miserable. loki s conclusion was firm and a resolute one ... he has been played out by the one who seemed to wear no masks at all ...but she wore that one of a proud ,honest ,uncorrupted small town girl.perhaps the war made changes in her,perhaps she hid it well in the beginning...perhaps it was that primal instincts for survival...also the glow from her eyes was gone ...the glow he missed so much....

.............................................................................

nothing lasts indefinitely,not even this status quo...lady winter has been taken away by the hand of some higher force , and at present ,the vigorous spring has dressed the fields with the vivacious shades of green and yellow...

herr commandant was being called in by herrn selvig....they have received an encrypted message...and loki froze after reading the content ...he was standing in that small cabinet, with that paper for nerve wrecking period... strangely,a weight has been lifted from his shoulders...after taking in the perky scent of fresh grass and near by stream ,as if he was seeking an encouragement from the nature ,which the asgardians raped remorselessly,he has rose the megaphone and yelled out::

"jeder auf dem gebiet (everyone to the filed)!and that includes both guards,prisoners ,stuff ,administration...i have an announcement to make!"

 

when the colorful crowd dressed in absolutely no colors at all ,directed their empty eyes at him...while the guards were distinctive in black,the prisoners and stuff seemed to be transparent in grey...herr commandant breathed in...this shall be his last speech as a camp s supervisor...

"we have only received this news .- the asgardian forces have surrendered in italy on 29th of april. total and unconditional surrender was signed on may 7th , to be effective by the end of 8th may.yesterday morning, at 2:41 a.m.,at general fury s headquarters,an asgardian general james barnes signed the act of an unconditional surrender of all asgardian land,sea and air forces in europe to the allied expeditionary force and simultaneously the soviet high command.the war is,therefore, at an end.at midnight tonight,the war is over. tomorrow you ,jotuns will begin the process of looking for the survivors of your families.In most cases,you won't find them.after six long years of murder,victims are being mourned throughout the world.you ve survived..I'm a member ofthe nazi party.also herr stark is a munitions manufacturer.we are profiteers of the slave labor.I am a criminal.at midnight you'll be free,and I'll be hunted,and so will my men."

loki saw the utter terror of both the guards ,who had merely the visions of death before them ,but were still holding onto an invisbile strings of fuhrer thanos...if they are about to die,they shall bring the jotuns along with them...the guns were raised .loki has seen,now this same fear in the eyes of the prisoners who had a spark of hope burning in their eyes for only a few brief moments...

loki has stepped in,and has taken one of the guns away from the hands of the young guard.he had to be 17 at the most.

"senken sie ihre kanonen männer (lower you guns men)!I know you have received orders which were received from the main office in berlin- to dispose of the population of this camp.now would be the time to do it.here they are, they're all here. this is your opportunit,isnt it?.or...you could leave and return to your families as men instead of murderers."

he didn't had to say it twice,even his guards have had enough...the tables have turned...many of them have had family which they will never see...children of which the knew nothing about...this was their last chance to try and reach them before it was too late...loki ,had his own orders,set by both his growing up and moral doubts...he could always rely upon his sense of duty. was not about to flee...the captain always goes down with the ship...and this was his titanic... a soft female gasp behind him...sigyn...with her hands over her mouth...her eyes were glowing once more ....

"theoric!"

the speed with which she passed by loki,perforated him ...his beloved one ran into the arms of one of the men from the other camp...

"i knew it ...i knew it ...you are alive..."

"sigyn! you are the one that gave my hope...you are the one for whom i have struggled ,but lived for! ich liebe dich (i love you)."

theoric was crying and hiding her petite form under his large arms...she has almost entirely disappeared from loki's sight.

-"und du bist der jenige, für den werde ich sterben ...and you are the one,for whom i will die for..."-loki thought...

 

                  

 

 

 


	22. Gone

the air cleared out ..it was fresher,than one could recall...there was no smoke ,to be a reminder of the militaristic oppressions ,nor were there those regular sounds of the guns...it was spring in all its splendor...even th birds begun to hover above...the animals sensed that something was an amiss ...in the most preferable manner...all cleared up...except the field....the prisoners kept arriving,and arriving...from all the directions,even the refugees from the woods..now when they were set free ,they ,naturally were demanding the justice...a retaliation..the most classical of all scenarios...

loki listened to both of their shouts and profanities ,as he was listening to the calming tick tocks of the old bavarian clock that had mostly an esthetic function on that wall..he has slowly lit his last cigarette...quite symbolic... there would always be a shipment of those an indispensable necessities during the weekend...yet this time...the shipment was delayed ... permanently...the glass was broken and the angry mob savagely entered the camp s office...his villa would doubtlessly be next...

the champagne from the 1930...hm...not a good year,and yet not a bad one.,but there's a certain rusticality about it which helped him envision those rich lands ,and vineyards ,here in these forsaken parts...since the 1840 s,the france has exported on the average nearly three- quarters of her production of champagne.after the war ,the distribution has drastically fallen,and this liquid gold was more valuable than ever... while pouring himself a glass...there was a sound of steps approaching from the hallway...he could at least have the chance to try the verdammt (darn ) drink.

he almost choked on the wine, when the fair haired, blue eyed peasant peered through the doors of his study..his muddy shoes were ruining the finest parquet,which the asgardian woods could provide...loki's nose wrinkled at the sight of such a lower class primitivism...strangely ,how he still had the mind of an asgardian , while his emotions sympathized with those...people...he was odin's experiment that went oh,so wrongly...

"um,sir...my name is theoric and sigyn has told me what you did...and um..."

loki bit on his tongue and poured himself more this time...he needed more...

" don't you knock? manners are a foreign practice to you,i see... i am aware of who you are...gefangene (prisoner). so ...my maid is a chatterbox ? hmm...yes,well that was to be expected from the likes of her."

the dissatisfaction about the way loki addressed his fiancee,theoric expressed quite plainly .but he did possessed the polite behavior of his own...in the shape of the respect and kindness and honor...and an understanding of the both sides..his and his interlocutors .,commandant was crossed and was waiting to get arrested or to be killed ...the least,the tall jotun could do , is to let ,the raven haired man spit out his poison.

"what.did.she tell you then?"

"that you have helped saving all those people...that you are not as bad as others believe ..and ,that you saved her from the officer...i am very thankful for that , herr odinson,and i have brought some clothing from the prisoners,if you want to..."

"want what? entkommen (to escape)? "

"well yes,that would be wise...the men...they are taking the law into their own hands."...

one could not ,not hear the breaking and the demolition which were occurring in the camp below ...

"khmkh...indeed.."

loki s cough was sophisticated,but it was masking his nervousness.

then he heard those sweet feminine footsteps...and the waves of golden locks have lighten up the room...

"lo...herr commandant !theoric ,you found him! please sir ,ran while you still can!"

loki directed sigyn,the most menacing glance possible,but still managed to control his tone,although he spoke through his teeth...

"theoric...you appear to be fair ,yet apparently naive and an illiterate. a standard poor bauer (farmer) of a low social status with a lack of taste and refinement,who ,once after arriving in the big city,deems himself to be cultivated..i doubt that your perceptiveness,if you have any,would inform you of certain ...irregularities .and by that i mean lies...the incomplete truth one has thrown upon you."

while sigyn s tiny round face turned purple and her small fists clenched ,loki s shade of green was very becoming.envy and resentfulness where atributes he was wearing with pride...and was subordinated to them...theoric was not his equal,for he indeed was of an another kind.but he could recognize an antagonism when he sees it. so , he made none of herr commandant s provocations.

"sir,i do not know what you mean."

"of course you dont.you are a simple...ton...yes?"

 

"loki! lass ihn in ruhe...(leave him alone)...you are acting like a child !we are only trying to save you!you will be dead in few minutes!dont you see that!?! quit with this game of yours and follow us!"

oh,how he loved her flame...sigyn was not one of those submissive little wives to be...no, she had an iron fist...beneath those velvet gloves of hers..yes, he understood perfectly...when she was with him,she thought of this pitiful an excuse for a man...but now...when he touches her,her thoughts will take her to the moments,which she and loki had shared...there were no men like him...and there will never be...if he is to die,he will die as a proud man...dignity and honor...above cowardness and sentimentality...but,before he dies ,he will have this small revenge...

visually,he ignored her entirely and carried his crystal glass to the window...one hand was in his pocket,and he was a tranquil as much as he could pretend to be.

"did sigyn mentioned anything else,theoric? something more...personal...?"

             

 

"stop it!nothing...es ist wirklich nichts (it is really nothing)!".

she pleaded...but he was not about to cease now...

"oh ,so this little imprudent maid of mine have left all the good details to herself, has she now? ."

the other man s face darkened,he was not as a fool as loki projected him to be..

"sir, i forbid you to suggest that ...i don't care if she was your maid or not,you have not right...!"

"oh, aber sie war mehr als das ... und viele, viele, viele Male (oh,but she was more than that...and many,many many times.)."

loki purred into the glass...the echo of it and the sweetness of the wine have loosened his stoic composure...as a suitable an attachment to his intents , he grinned mischievously and licked his lips...

theoric was rolling up his sleeves,and loki s hand was reaching for that gun ,which was in the pocket the whole time...but sigyn appeared between the two of them,and in the last moment...she was so small,but she never perceived herself as such ...loki could only appreciate her more for that...but she has chosen...he has nothing to run for,but for her ....no,that was an another story...a fancy fairytale...

"no,no more...nicht mehr gewalt (no more violence)...if herr wants to stay...fine! come theoric ,let us leave...there is nothing here for us anymore...we did what we could ..."

the large blond nodded,and his face softened..oh,she shall wrap him around her little finger...

"du hast recht (you are right)...he has fallen and he uses his bitterness to look down at us .but,he is the one who is at the bottom."

after that, they went for the doors...and he watched at them,two figures in the distance , from his window,silently motionlessly...sigyn turned for one last time...her eyes have not caught his sight...for he was already gone...the prisoners have penetrated the villa...which will soon perish in flames...

-..................................................................................................

in the upcoming months the world went from the absence of light into the one of hope ...the media screamed with the titles which referred to the beasts of war and their sentences...and the crowd desirously digested the news...

the most important ones were the next : officer barton was fated to an electric chair...victor von doom suffered from the poison which was injected into his veins...a very suitable death indeed,for he got a taste of his own medicine...dr strange..died from an embolism just before the trial...he died in pain. herr sutur was killed by the prisoners in the jail...many were contra social nationalistically revolted .plus he has contributed to the deaths of their loved ones..

thor odinson was freed of the charges for the crimes against humanity...for he was not participating in the war,not directly...later on sigyn,now happily married, has seen his photograph with his mother frigga...they have moved to the cottage in the mountains...they were smiling....antonio stark has become an international hero,and received numerous an awards and medals...he and his wife ,virginia were already expecting a baby .in the years to come,he would start a successful business in the production of home appliances...

as for loki...theoric has found sigyn weeping on the bed that day...she was unable to eat or drink...and even though,she spoke no words,nor menationed anything...he was wondering about the reasons for her feminine moodiness..and was genuinely concerned...this coudl not be those days...the answer did not come until he saw a small article in the papers..and many things have became much clearer..

it said :...commandant loki odinson was found dead in the mansion above the camp "asgard ".the house was set on fire by the group of jotuns .due to the unrecognizability of the body,he was identified by his brother, thor odinson.the objects which were used to determine if this truly was loki odinson , were the watch his father has given him and whatever was left of his uniform..."

 


	23. Imagine

1955...10 years after...

a warm summer breeze rushed through her curls and disordered her perfectly formed hairstyle...the clicking of her high heels were insignificant and lost among the vivid and vibrant sounds around her...berlin was alive yet again,rebuilt ...many have returned...many will never...the memories and mementos of the war were still deep in people's hearts and conscious...but ,the changes were apparent...

what was significant was this day...one in line of the similar ones,and so diverse...few hours ago, while she was taking measurement of her client for a dress,she received a phone call from her an investor...virginia helped sigyn to get back on her feet...while working in the factory ,her sewing has immensely improved , and now she turned those skills into this creative and profitable business... a designer for custom made dresses...and her store was already on a good reputation...especially when mrs stark has mentioned that she wears hers dresses.sigyn got her space in the papers and the reviews only bolded what was known...in the "elize" one gets both quality and the desired product in the record amount of time.

even though sigyn planned to repay the last marken to her friend,virginia would hear none of it.

today she called sigyn and was unusually excited:

"hallo!

"guten tag,virginia."

sigyn on the other hand,was weary,but had to smile and work under pressure...so much to do ,so very little time..

"have you heard...the court,after listening to all of those testimonies, have finally decided to dismiss the accusations against loki . his innocence is proven .all went into the consideration :the fact that he was kidnapped as a child,that he lost his memory,later on, that he has risked for the safety of the others...! isn't it great?"

 

sigyn's face and heart dropped...she didn't really mentioned loki during this past year...which does not allude that she has forgotten about him... her thoughts were hers own,and she was not obligated to share them with anyone...not even her husband.

"yes,yes that is wonderful..but... it is 10 years too late..."

"would you do me a favor?only few days ago i have met his brother býleistr.he has an accounting agency in the western part of the town...i'll give you the address ,if you want to talk to him."

"býleistr! er lebt (he is alive)?"

"yes,he has spent almost 5 years in the woods ,while hiding from the asgardians during the war.i recommend that you go and see him...today.!"

........................................................

and so how could,sigyn ,a restless thing as she was,say no...or let the time passes purposelessly by as she indecisively contemplates and weight her options ...she has left the work to her mother freya and rushed to that adress...a half an hour in the taxi seemed to last for hours ...her tight skirt was not permitting any unlady like movements,yet she has hurried nevertheless..she is about to talk to someone who was related...had a connection with loki...like a drop in the ocean,but it was something...and there it was,straight ahead...a large yellow sign " laufey's bookkeeping.."

the bell rang when the doors opened...a was standing man behind the counter .and his size was more frightening than an impressive ...his once dark hair ,now was the color of an ash ..the greys softened the contours of his sharp facial features .but the tragedies remained...the tragedies through which he himself,also went through ,as a reminder ...they were woven deep into his eyes,which made him appear more humanly.and then he greeted her with a cordial and welcoming smile.

"guten tag frau , or is it fraulein...how may i help you?"

"um guten tag,herr...meine freundin virginia stark has sent me here. for the reasons i don't know why..."

"ah,then you must be sigyn..it's a pleasure .i have heard so much about you!yes i have meet mrs an mr stark just recently and we had a long conversation."

she felt some uneasiness,which was normal during such recollections.the past,this man could only re-examine the past with the starks...

"...i ...am am so sorry about what happened to your family."

he lowered his gaze,it was his achilles heel...

"danke,those were...schrecklichen zeiten (awful times)...i hope they will never repeat ...but there is luck to be found,in the negativenss...and to me ,that was one of my family members...my brother was surprisingly alive."

"helblindi?"

byleistr said nothing,at first...but then he went to the doors and locked them,turning the sign "closed" towards the outside world.

"you dont know the reasons for being here ,mrs,but ,trust me...i do.if you want to know which those are ,you should go in there..."

an another doors ,which now came to he sight.they seemed to lead into the storage...worse ,they were an entrance to the cellar...narrow stairways surrounded by the barren walls ,and an unhealthy amount of the humidity.

"was gibt es in (what is in there)?"

she was confused,and more and more determined to leave ...but he shook his head..

"i am sorry,i cant tell you this.besides i have to work.but... you do want to see what is down there."

he did intimidated her, but he also planted a seed of the curiosity and the thrill of mystery in sigyn s thick head...

 

............................................................

..he has heard of this new verdict,but after the years in an effectual avoiding of the others, the evasion itself has become a habit .the conditions in the world around him were unlike in nature, form, or quality to the world , he was one with ...now ,out there he was claustrophobic and agoraphobic...he was unable to keep the track...here,in this closed and congested space he had all...or he was assuring himself in the truthfulness of that claim.loki,an accountant...working day and night ,to pass the time...to be an effective ...to feel the redemption...

the television,conformism instead of an overall adventurous practical contact in the cinemas could endow. the rebellious young men and women,under the influence of this loud music ...and the most preposterous of all,the stories of sending the men to the space and moon...the world has gone mad,indeed...once it had a structure,and the structure was often being destroyed,but it had structure,nevertheless..at the time present ...it was ludicrously anarchic for an old fashioned member of higher class...no,loki preferred his books,gramophone,and would go out only when obligations demanded.

"byleistr,since you are here ,i need more paper.."

"es ist nicht bylister (it is not bylister)".

she said...

his head rose .. his goddess..sigyn was all woman now...with curves in all the right places...dressed in tight yellow costume....that dramatic make up and hairstyle added the similarity to the renaissance picture of venus ,which hanged in his former study...

"sigyn?"

"hi,loki,it has been a while..

 

 

 

he still pried at this mirage...she could not possibly be here...he hesitated prior shaping a coherent clause.

"yes,yes it has...you...you look ... absoultely splendid ...wie geht es dir (how are you)?"

the way she smiled now ,was in the contrast of the way she did it when he has last seen her. loki has noticed that her posture was now classy and refined...not careless and dependable upon her present feelings...

"i am fine.i am an owner of the women's clothing store.and the work is going quite well...i am happy...my mother is helping me with the kids when i have lot to do...so.."

yet an another taciturn smile...her words were also picked among many,which she wanted to state or voice ...this tension between them was an unnatural,contrary to the course tey would innteract...but,years have done their part...

"yes i have read about it .i am very glad for you.you deserved it.you are very talented and i am 100 percent positive that you will succed no matter what you set your mind on."

sigyn was not the one to take compliments thus easily ,for she believed in hard work ,not mere luck...the cosmos would debate with her upon this theme...

"what about you?your brother did not explained to me how you ended up in here...wie sie überlebt (how you survived) ?"

"it is a decently a lengthy story...in mean...if you have the time...."

"oh,but i do..."

a gesture for her to sat down ,and an offered coffee...loki gasped arousingly pitiful chance to shorten their physical distance ...he ever pulled out the chair for her...and she smelled of violets and honey...

her unintentional spell was already casted ,but loki was not leisured enough to show her ,how much she has been missed...he filled her a cup with the coffee latte ...and leaned back...his body ached from the unavoidable immobility in this clutter..some ventilation would not hurt,as well...

"so..upon that day...err night...when you and ...your husband have left the grounds of the camp ,the prisoners did penetrated my festung (fortress)...what they could not carry, they have either destroyed or burned to the grounds...i was still there...in my study, when one of them threatened me with the rifle and claimed my jacket and watch...after i had given him what he sought after...he and his friends used the force against me...namely,the beaten the life out of me...finally,when i came to my senses again...the house was on fire and i almost suffocated from the smoke,..."

"the man who robbed me was dead...manifestly , they have fought over my belongings and in the end,turned against one an another .i barely had the time to take the coat ,but not my own,for it was caught in flames ,but the one ,which your theoric has given me .the other item i ve took was a photograph of my mother.that is all i have managed to salvage.it was a miracle,that i left the house before the ceiling collapsed...i witnessed the this somewhat fictional an ocurrence from the distance...afterwards... i spent the night in the ...contemplating should i surrender myself or not...since there was no one,nor i got the an impression that there will be any train on this route...nor it has been for the last 48 stunden ( hours) .since i terribly dilsike waiting,sigyn,i have resolved to go into the woods myself ...to put my destiny into the hands of whoever i am to meet there..hours of walking followed...with some more hours of searching for a hideout from the rain. i felt,as if i was walking in circles...for all apppered the same...until i came across a group of people i knew...stark s workers .i am still surprised that they have took pity on me ....they said that i have saved their wives,daughters and mothers...so,i accepted their hospitality and stayed with them for the next couple of days...as a token ,a voucher i gave them the single thing i had with me...my story ...i confessed that i am killer of my own people..."

loki stopped...he seemed intensely disturbed by this ...to truly be aware of your misdoings and crimes ...that will burden one's soul forever...

"loki?"

"ah ,yes,where was i...?"

"sie sagte jemand, dass sie ein jotun sind. (you told someone that you are a jotun)."

once more,this new sigyn ,who was sitting opposite of him,this lady , was careful with words...she meant no harm...but the sight of her was merely burying him...

"ganz recht (quite right)...um...that man have listened .he didn't judged ,he did not denounced or betrayed my trust ... nor he had advised me to give myself in.funny ,he told me to wait...and so i did...again...come what may...as an old proverb goes...by the noon,on the next day ,he reappeared ,but this time with an another man.he glanced over me,and said :"loki this is byleistr,your brother..." our first encounter was rather...an emotional one ...."  
"...he and his friends stood by my side...i still dont know why...i had hoped,for at least, a fast death,which never came...they said that they would probably did some things similarly...only imagine this ,sigyn, that you were in my place...an asgardian...that you had to kill ,or your family would be killed...i had no choice...i made so much mistakes...and i will never forgive myself..."

"some have forgiven you.and now by the law,you are free."

"but many will never...and they shouldn't.i am not free ...freiheit (freedom),in my case is a lie...a mockery...i am my own master,servant and a slave.."

suddenly his cold hand covered one of hers....and she was so warm...

"i have never begged for your forgiveness,so i must do it presently ,for i fear that i'll not have anymore opportunities to do so....you suffered because of me.."

just then, her other hand,shrouded his cold one...both of those tiny gentle hands have symbolically bonded loki .he was not only his own slave,he was hers...

"i have forgiven you a long, long time ago.and i dont want to be yet an another reason for your self hate.this ...guilt ...it will eat you up...the probability for this is non existing,but you were given a chance,loki.and you are wasting it in ...here. "

he took his hand away,and looked back at his papers..

" thank you sigyn,you are kind..."

the silence was back again and sigyn wanted to change the topic...she has not seen him in 10 years and she didn't want this meeting to end at this... bitter resentfulness .

"how are your mother and brother...thor?"

one may say that loki has loosened his barriers a bit..

,"mother is alright.her health has improved..especially since she spends her days in the fresh mountain air....thor likes to be occupied with ,was he calls it, true man s work. no more office for him,no... he is a fortunate .did you know that he and mother were bringing food and medicine to few of the jotuns families,back then...they provided them with the refuge...and,later on ,thor avoided jail...his idle arsch actually has kept him safe......now,his plans are enclosing... hiking ...the hutte (cottage) is now a boarding house for the wandering travellers .they make a decent living out of it.and who knows, thor could get married someday soon...to some swiss brunette sif...or what is her name...."

"you,yourself didnt get married ?"

"hmmm...i was hiding for a decade...those brief relationships are nothing but unwürdig (un worthy )of recalling..."

"oh."

loki could not put his finger upon what her "oh " should stand for,so he turned the tables.

"and theoric,how is he? weiß er, dass du hier bist ...(does he know that you are here)...?"

"he ...he had a job as a construction worker ...i was against it,but it did pay the bills...his profession was wanted...we were doing just fine...but...there was an accident and he fell...and um...he died...few days afterwards..."

"sigyn...i am so sorry ..i didnt know.!"

she took a handkerchief from her small purse and wiped the tears...

"um...it is alright...i learned how to deal with him being gone...theoric was a good,kind man...you know...and if it was not for the starks,i would not be able to provide enough for the children."

he desired to wrap his long arms around her small frame and take the pain away...but he was beneath her...so very far beneath her...

her lips suddenly went upwards.

"would you...would you like to see the photographs of the children?valia and narvi."

"i would love to.."

loki gifted her with the most honest smile he could conjur.

the first photograph was the one of the sweet blonde haired girl .she was evidently guilty for dirtying her dress,but she beamed with pride .

"goodness,.she is all you...not just in schönheit( beauty),but i do see some similarities regarding ...,"

"...her attitude,oh,believe me i am aware of that.although,i do feel ashamed of being so headstrong myself ..valia,reminds me of me.oh ,my poor mother,what she had to endure..."

"Ihre hartnäckigkeit ist nichts, aber ein teil ihrer charme.(your stubbornness is a nothing,but a part of your charm).and disregard all those who tell you otherwise."

sigyn eye rolled,but she was lavishely praised ,and she forgot how it felt like...loki still held to the limits of the formalities,but those emeralds would always uncover his most arcane thoughts...and she was a great part of them.

the elaborate relationship loki had with sigyn,which was,truthfully , unbalanced gave him the abilities to read her,as much as she could him.he supiscions,would,though direct him to the false conclusions .not now...sigy had to know his mind....and his greatest fear was that this is the one ,the last meeting they get.he meant to be as open as much as it was to be permitted....

"i am but honest ...there was not a day that went by .. that i did not thought about you...however ,i believe you thought of me too,but from the negative side ."

"nein, das ist nicht wahr! (no,that is not true)! do not put your words into my mouth...you made me what i am today...a strong and an independent ,successful woman!"

"what doesn't kills you,makes you stronger"-nietzsche..."

she blushed and bit on her lower lip...

"do you know how i called my store?...."elize"..."

"elize...from the beethoven's composition?oh, sigyn...Ich bin wirklich geehrt (i am truly honored)...so not all our moments were unpleasant ones ?"

they laughed... quite heartilly ...was the ice broken?or was that only loki's undisclosed desire...

they really were jumping from one extreme onto the other...to make that strong pink tone disappear from her cheeks,she reached into her flowery wallet again.

"... und dies ist das foto von narvi (and this is the photo of narvi).."

the black and white photograph which loki took did not,as he predicted, displayed a light haired muscled boy,but a thin ,pouting one ...with the straight ink black hair that was falling over one side of his face.

"valia is funf (five) and narvi is almost neun (nine). "

loki's eyes ran over to hers..there was a very an audible quiver in his voice.

"sigyn ..."

 

"theoric knew, of course...but never questioned me .he respected my wish about leaving what occured in the camp ,where it belongs ...in the past.i should tell you ,that he was a wonderful father to narvi. he loved him...i was two months along , when we left the camp...do not worry,for i ask nothing of you. you are not obligated to do anything...i only thought ,that you should know,that you have a son.."

a pause.... uneasy and formidable pause...loki s fingers were slowly tapping on the pile of papers..

sigyn s cheeks now turned pale :"um...maybe it is the best if i leave now,..."

" i did not react in the manner you have probably expected me to,and that is something you cant blame me for. it is one of the rare things,but nevertheless...please ,give me a moment...literally ,you have taken the words away from me..."

"the young witwe (widow) has nervously finished her coffee,while loki slowly paced through the room .

"...the boy...narvi...i am sure that he is not conscious of this worrying matter ..."

"nicht unterschätzen ihn (do not underestimate him),as you did me ,loki laufeyson! in a way , he always knew that he is so unlike his father.we had a difficult conversation a year after theoric died."

sigyn wiped her tears again...why do conversations with loki have an ending task of wounding ?

loki listened to the silence between them ...he seemed more paler and  
confounded.

oh,no,not again...sigyn has forcefully replaced her melancholy with the firm attitude...

"loki,i would like you to meet narvi ."

"i would love that more than anything,aber ich bin ein mord (but i am a murder)..."

"you were in the similar situation,right? you will never have the chance of meeting your biological parents,but narvi still has that chance .please do not take this away from him."

those thin lips of his twitched,firstly upwards and then they have fallen down again...

"sigyn i must warn you...if you invite me in your life again,i am afraid you will find that it is an extremely hard to get rid of me."

her white teeth reflected the pureness of her pearl earrings and the red lipstick made her smile even greater.

"i believe i can deal with that.but only if you can imagine yourself ,along with all three of us...am sonntag (on sunday) ,in the park...having a picnic."

"sigyn, stellte ich mir etwas in der nähe, dass die zweite sie auf dieser treppe erschien. (sigyn,i imagined something close to that ,the second you appeared on those stairs.)"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok,so that is mostly that.thank u so much for reading pliz comment.


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